A Profundity of Words

The development of language represents one of the key elements in humankind's rapid progression as a species. While other beings are able to communicate -- often in complex ways -- language has allowed people to vastly expand knowledge, establish social contracts (i.e., government) and develop far flung economic systems. In addition, via the arts, language has allowed people to conjure up imagery through the writer or poet's pen.

Yet, for all the benefits language has bestowed on human society, it still has many drawbacks. For one, hundreds of different languages and/or dialects have sprung forth and, sometimes, people from the same geographical area find that they don't understand the words of their neighbors.

For another, though we possess massive dictionaries and rules of usage, words are a very personal thing. Often, nuance plays a large role in the understanding of specific words and what a word means to me may be altogether different from what the same word means to you. Some words are exceedingly vague like big or small. In order to understand the use of these words, we must understand them in context even when the context is missing or the context exists solely in the author's head.

The biggest drawback to the use of language and words, however, is that we humans sometimes attempt to use them to describe the indescribable. We get so egotistically caught up in our ability to communicate that we try to communicate things we don't understand or we begin to mistake the words themselves for the thing we're unsuccessfully trying to describe.

The Tao that can be told is not the eternal Tao.
The name that can be named is not the eternal name.
~ from One, of the Tao Te Ching ~

The ultimate source of life (Tao, Jehovah, Allah, God, etc.) is a process or entity so broad and all encompassing that none of us understands it or even a fraction of it. Anything we can say or write about it is feeble in comparison to it.

Throughout the eons people have tried to describe it by giving it human characteristics and emotions. We've been told what it likes and dislikes. What it will tolerate and not tolerate.

Far too many people have taken these farcical descriptions to be the thing itself. IT, thereby, becomes nothing more than a strange amalgamation of words -- words that people will kill and die for.

I can write volumes about Tao, but my words are not Tao itself. Tao is beyond my limited comprehension and anything I say about it is minuscule in comparison to it. All I can do is barely scratch the surface.

The Way It Isn't

A lot of people first come to this blog as the result of a search of some form of the word, Taoism. If you know little or nothing about this ancient philosophical system, then I have a word of caution for you.

This blog is authored by a devotee of classical (philosophical) Taoism. While I discuss a myriad of topics here, my understanding of Taoism permeates almost everything I write. However, while you may glean some information about Taoism here, my word is NOT the final word. You must experience Tao for yourself.

Unlike religion or other ideological practices, there is no definitive authority of Tao. Throughout the ages there have been Taoist sages (people of wisdom), but they offer nothing more than their take on the world around them. In other words, while you may gain insight or find inspiration in their works, they offer nothing definitive either!

As indicated above, the only way any of us can tap into Tao is to experience it ourselves. How you experience it is unique to you and you alone. What you do with this knowledge is unique to you and you alone. How you share your understanding of Tao with others is unique to you and you alone.

I can't tell you which path to take to Tao any more than you can tell me. All I can offer you are insights and observations that may or may not spark something within you. By the same token, if you leave a comment here or contact me via email, all you can offer me are insights and observations that may or may not spark something within me.

While discussion is not a bad thing -- in many instances, it can be very beneficial -- discussion alone will not teach you about Taoism. Reading the works of Taoist sages or books about Taoism can be of help, but this alone will not teach you about Taoism. None of these external things will make Tao more accessible to you.

We each must find Tao on our own.

Second Nature

I realized, after finishing my last post, that comparing wu wei to being "in the zone" might lead some to ask, "OK Einstein, how does one get in the zone?" Taoist philosophy offers a very straightforward answer. It's not one bound up in secret rituals, contrived prayers, particular body positions nor specific bodily movements. It's far simpler than that -- It comes with practice.

Falling back again on a sports-based analogy, it's why athletes -- regardless of their level or proficiency -- practice the fundamentals over and over ad nauseam. You practice and practice and practice so that, whatever your discipline is, it becomes second nature to you. You want to get to the point in which you merely react to various situations WITHOUT the need to think through every step along the way.

When we first learn a craft or discipline, we often create checklists of the various steps needed to complete each particular task. Some people literally write this information down, while others keep a virtual checklist in their head. We move slowly, referring to the checklist every step of the way. Sometimes, when beginning step 6, we realize we skipped step 3 and have to start all over again.

As we slowly learn the steps involved, we are able to complete the task satisfactorily, but we do it in a start-stop-start again fashion. In other words, because we're still getting our feet under us, so to speak, the activity doesn't flow as intended. In time, if we continue to practice the steps over and over again, we get to the point in which the task becomes second nature and we no longer need to think about it -- we just do it!

For me, this is how I understand wu wei. It's the ability to complete tasks, duties and responsibilities in an effortless manner. Hence, the appearance of action through no action.

Two Typical Misconceptions

Taoism addresses the world in an altogether different manner than what most westerners are accustomed to, the Judeo-Christian perspective. It is because of these fundamental differences that many misconceptions abound. In this post, I will discuss two.

The first misconception is that Taoism is a very self-centered philosophical system. Most religions have rituals, creeds, holy books and at least one deity. All of these aspects are missing from Taoism. Most religions -- particularly Christianity, Judaism and Islam -- have codes of conduct and prohibited acts. Taoism doesn't explicitly have either.

If a person joins the faith community of Christianity, Judaism or Islam, there is an institutional system (churches, synagogues and mosques) to instruct the initiate in the ways to live, pray and reach heaven. In Taoism, no such system exists. Instead of a proscribed path to salvation, Taoism teaches that each person must find their own path for themselves.

So, on the surface, I can understand this misconception. If a person doesn't understand the central Taoist idea that everything is connected, then it might seem like a self-centered philosophy. It is this interconnectedness, however, that moves Taoism from a self-centered system to an all-centered system.

While we each must find our own path, we must do so in a way that maintains harmony or balance within ourselves AND the world around us. The path itself will be of our own choosing, but the journey encompasses everything.

The second misconception has to do with the concept of wu wei (action by non-action). A lot of westerners take this to mean that Taoists either are lazy, by choice, or they seek to withdraw from the social world. This misunderstanding seems to fly in the face of the religious emphasis on community.

I've got to be honest. I too initially had trouble grasping the brilliance of wu wei. I used to think it was counterintuitive to get something accomplished by doing nothing. However, little by little I've come to understand the concept and it's not what it appears to be.

Utilizing a sports-based example, wu wei is the same as being "in the zone". When a batter in baseball is on a hot streak, I've often heard them say it's like everything around them slows down and the ball looks as big as a beach ball. They hit it without consciously thinking about it.

Another example is the writer who, struck by inspiration, allows the words and imagery to pour out of them. Many will say it's like the book or poem wrote itself. Both of these examples exemplify wu wei.

When each of us must think consciously of what it is that we must do, we engage in rote motions and follow precise steps or recipes. While we may accomplish the task, we do so without flow. However, when we're "in the zone", we don't consciously think at all; we just do. It flows out of us in the rhythm of the stream and, before we know it, the task has completed itself -- almost as if we are an innocent bystander.

We've completed what we set out to do as if WE didn't really do anything at all.

My Light in the Darkness

If you read the statistics, marriage is a difficult row to hoe. Estimates indicate that in the U.S. nearly "50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce". The rate is particularly high for childless couples and a marriage is doing well if it survives for 10 years or more!

I know a thing or two about divorce. My own parents married and divorced each other twice!! My first marriage ended in divorce -- it was a marriage that never should have happened as my first wife and I had next too nothing in common and vastly different philosophies of life.

Defying the statistics, however, my second marriage (to my dear Della) has been my salvation. To be certain, it was rocky in the beginning and, at the 6 year mark, I didn't think we'd make it to year 7. My mother's death, however, caused both Della & I to see life in a different light. We realized how fleeting our time is and we both realized we were better together than apart.

Since that defining moment, our bond has grown stronger and stronger. While many relationships grow stale and stagnant as the years slip by, our love and respect for each other has only deepened with the years. It has gotten to the point in which I can't fathom Della not being the biggest part of my life.

I must admit that I feel blessed and extremely lucky that I met Della when I did and that she stuck with me through my many physical and emotional trials and tribulations. One thing I forgot to add in the introductory statistical section is that marriages involving a partner with AS show an extremely high incidence of divorce!!

One of the reasons I feel exceedingly lucky is that I'm not the romantic sort which, I think, is typical of aspies. When we were younger, I certainly didn't woo my wife. Though I can be very loving, I'm not the kind of fellow to get down on one knee to propose. In fact, there was never a definitive moment when I proposed marriage; it simply occurred as a routine progression in our relationship.

The other reason I feel lucky in hooking up with Della is that I've never been keen on the idea of being a parent. I think I realized early on that my personality simply was not conducive to parenthood. It has turned out that being a parent wasn't that important to Della either.

My first wife, Ann, also indicated that children weren't that important to her. Unfortunately, sometime during year 2, her biological clock started ticking. All of a sudden, she wanted to talk about starting a family and that was a conversation that was a non-starter for me. She obviously was serious because, within 6 months of separating, she was pregnant!

When my relationship with Della started getting serious (almost immediately!), I worried about her biological clock. In fact, earlier on, I wasn't too keen on the marriage idea because I was worried that somewhere down the road her clock would go off. But she was persistent and, fortunately, it's never gone off. :-)

A Personal Dichotomy

One of the enduring messages of Taoism is flexibility. This can be seen in the references to the bamboo plant. Bamboo can withstand tremendous winds by bending, yet not breaking. Another point of illustration is water. Water itself is formless and flows in the areas of least resistance. Place an insurmountable obstacle in the river channel and the water will simply flow around it cutting a new course.

Both of these metaphors -- particularly the water -- appeal to my spiritual self. There have been many times, when faced with a challenge or a dilemma, that I've asked myself, "How would a river handle this?"

Yet, while my spiritual and intellectual selves embraces this principle, my physiological self is anything BUT flexible. Both my physical and emotional selves tend to be rigid.

From a physical standpoint, the key hallmark to my life is the pain from fibromyalgia and degenerative arthritis. When a part of the body hurts, I don't want to move it much. So, I tend to hold it rigidly in position to avoid unnecessary pain.

I'm also a quintessential klutz! Clumsiness happens to be common symptoms of those with KS and AS. During my youth, my parents took me to the local emergency room an average of twice per year from the ages 2 - 18 and I had many more major accidents that simply necessitated a visit to the family doctor.

Here's a brief list of my youthful "accidents":

• Struck in the head twice by moving golf clubs;
• Had a hockey stick broken over my head;
• Knocked unconscious by baseballs;
• Kicked in the face (with cleats) during soccer match;
  
• Left foot sliced from big toe to heal by jagged glass;
• Several stitches to left index finger caught in moving bicycle chain;
• Bites and scrapes when attacked by a German Shepherd;
• Stung multiple times in groin by a swarm of yellow jackets;
• Swallowed entire bottle of Children's Aspirin (age 2) -- had stomach pumped;
• Broken left arm from falling off of bicycle;
• Gravel dug out of knee from falling off of bicycle (different incident);
• General injuries from falling out of a tree;
• And, my personal favorite, getting a hypodermic needle stuck 2" deep in my right heel -- was yanked out with pliers by ex-Marine neighbor.

Due to all these accidents and more, I try to be as sure-footed as possible (it doesn't help though!) and I don't like trying to move with the situation because it almost always means I will end up injuring myself!

As I've chronicled here over the past month, my AS causes my personality to detest change in all its various forms. I plod through life following my rituals and I tend to come unglued if any of these rituals are interrupted or altered.

So, I seem to have a bit of a split in my make-up and I'm having a devil of a time trying to bring these different pieces together to form a whole.

Variations on a Theme

Continuing on with this discussion of the concept of certainty, religion is the result of humankind's need to feel certain in an uncertain world. Life can be brutish, at times, and the human psyche desires some stasis to stem the flow of the uncertainty and constant change that envelops us.

As someone with AS, I can understand the NEED for certainty and constancy better than most! My life is structured into regular routines that I rarely deviate from. I don't like changes in my routines and I like surprises even less. Yet, for my neurological need for sameness, I rationally realize that, no matter how regimented I try to make my life, I simply can't modify enough variables to be certain of anything. More importantly, I am fully cognizant that, just because I desire certainty and constancy, this doesn't mean they actually exist.

In a way, I can understand many of the challenges faced by early humankind. Back before cell phones and modern medicine, primitive man was never sure where the next meal would come from OR if there would be a next meal. Members of the tribe who seemed fine one day, might inexplicably die tomorrow. Weather was a complete mystery and often played a key role in life and death.

Out of this random existence, humankind needed some reassurances that a) somebody was looking out for them and b) some reward lay at the end of the road. So, religion was invented to provide a "sense" of certainty about life, death and many of the in betweens. While this creation couldn't genuinely provide any more certainty than before, people still wrapped themselves in it nonetheless because cosmetic certainty was far better than no certainty at all!

Religion has continued to grow throughout the generations because, try as we might, we can't seem to engender any more certainty about the mysteries of life than our ancestors. While there is no question that humankind has progressed in all sorts of fields and knowledge, in this one specific area, we really haven't progressed at all.

Today's world creates just as much tension and stress as the primitive world. Arbitrary things happen all the time. People still die for unknown reasons or don't die for unknown reasons. Many throughout the world still wonder where their next meal will come from OR if there will be a next meal. And we're still at the mercy of Mother Nature!

Faced with all these stresses and so much uncertainty, people tend to cling to vestiges of comfort and reassurance -- religion. They cling to religion so tightly that they make themselves believe beyond any certainty of doubt that it is real and unchanging. To admit that it is nothing more than a calculated facade is next too impossible for the vast majority of believers because, if they did admit it, then it would mean that they are no better off than primitive man, in this regard.

Modern vanity will simply not entertain this possibility!

Certain Uncertainty

In an earlier post today, "Hooray for the Atheists", I briefly touched on religious zealotry. The author of Forest Wisdom both left a comment here and broadened the discussion with "Let the Mystery Be...". One of themes this ongoing discussion entails is the concept of certainty.

Probably not a day goes by when each of us says or writes we are sure or certain of something. While we may be almost certain (99.999% sure), the truth of the matter is that we can't be entirely certain because, as far as our limited brain matter allows, NOTHING is certain.

Yes, what we have determined to be a fixed outcome may occur as we expect 99 times out of 100, but anomalies happen too. So, all that certainty genuinely means is that we expect this outcome to match many, many others.

Another problem with concept of certainty is that it's based on currently available knowledge or theories. An outcome that was certain in 1361 may not have been certain at all in 1994. Many of the incontrovertible facts that we hold to be certain today may be laughed at in 200 years.

Returning to the topic of religious zealotry, it consistently amazes me how some people can be so certain of their beliefs. While mathematical theorems can be [conditionally] proven based on the state of current knowledge and conceptualization, religious belief doesn't even have this shaky leg to stand on. No, these beliefs are based more on anecdotal information passed down through hundreds or thousands of years.

Even more astonishing to me is that those who hold to these non-empirical beliefs are often the very same people who pooh pooh empirically-documented beliefs [facts]. While there is no way rationally to prove or disprove the existence of a particular deity, our available understanding of the world can identify that global warming exists and is leading us toward ecological ruin. Yet, these kinds of individuals will toss aside all the science of climate change, while embracing the non-science of the existence of a personal God.

For them, all that is needed for certainty is faith, yet the very definition of faith itself means to believe in something you can't be sure of. Try to explain this to a zealot and they simply walk away shaking their heads and praying for your immortal soul.

It drives me bonkers. I'm certain of this. :-)

Finding One's Path

If you've happened upon this blog due to an interest in Taoism and you want to know how to go about finding your path, you won't find a step-by-step guide here. There are no secret recipes. There is no blueprint available. Each person must discover their path and how to get there for themselves.

And I'll grant, right off the bat, it won't be easy. We live in a world that regularly thumbs its nose at Tao and that steers people away from seeking their path.

It's a world that reveres domination of nature, not a reverence for the natural rhythms of life.

It's a world that embraces strength over weakness and youth over wisdom.

It's a world in which we are incessantly bombarded with overt and subliminal messages that financial wealth and power will bring us happiness and security.

It's a world in which sensual sexuality trumps love and tenderness.

It's a world that values certainty over uncertainty and stasis over change.

In essence, we live in a world that goes against everything we know in our innermost beings. It's very, very difficult to find that quiet place in our souls and to seek the natural nourishment we need.

The method that many Taoists will advise for you to seek this place is to empty yourself so that you can become a vessel for Tao to fill up. But how does one shut out this mind-numbing world?

Again, it's not easy. It's very difficult to blot away our dreams, aspirations, pressures and stresses, to empty our minds completely. In a 24/7 world, it is near impossible to find genuine stillness. However, regardless of the difficulty, each of us must find it.

In a world beset by so many problems, many of us want to heal the world. But the old adage is true -- Heal thyself. The first step in the journey is to find that stillness within us and effortlessly embrace it.

Reflections in the Mirror

As I've begun to reacquaint myself with several of my favorite blogs, one issue that a lot of my fellow bloggers deal with in their profile or "About Me" section is why he/she blogs. On more than one occasion, the host asks out loud if he/she might possibly be narcissistic.

My reaction to this question is that if bloggers are narcissistic, then it's no different than any author, reporter, painter, sculptor, artist, actor, poet, chef, etc. To be quite honest, I think most all of us are a bit narcissistic and that it's healthy to be so. We know ourselves better than anyone else and so it's quite natural to enjoy our own company and reflection.

Narcissism only becomes a serious problem IF you become so enamored with your own visage that you ignore the concerns, wants and needs of others. But, in my book, if you can't love and spend time with yourself, you'll never be able genuinely to love anyone else.

So, why do I blog? There are many reasons. For starters, I have a lot to say and, since I'm not a social creature, blogging offers me the opportunity to share my thoughts with others. The collarary to this is that I receive feedback from you, my readers. This provides me with an opportunity to meet new people in this virtual realm and even to feel a sense of community. One of my quasi-regular readers hails from Belgium (a shout out to Bert) and, since I've never traveled to Europe and probably never will, I've had the chance to converse with nice young fellow that I would not have met otherwise!

Since I don't seem to be capable of communicating well verbally, my favored form of communication is through writing. The blog format allows me to work out things in my head and to get them down on paper, so to speak.

I also like to see my words in print. Sure, it's an example of my vanity leaking out, but what the hell? Vanity, like narcissism, ain't such a bad thing as long as one doesn't go overboard.

Since I tend to write a lot (in spurts, that is), it gives me a place to house my various ramblings. Since I haven't made a big effort to learn or follow all the tips and tricks one should employ to drive traffic to this blog, it's not like thousands of people read what I write anyway.

I'm actually glad I have a small readership. As specific blogs become more popular, they create their own staggering expectations. The blog host[s] feel compelled to write even when they don't really have much to impart. Since we live in a society where growth is a paramount goal, one could easily stress themselves out trying to keep to an unnatural and unsustainable writing schedule in order to bring more and more readers to their blog.

I write when I feel like writing. Lately, I've been writing a lot. At other times though, I write very little. I've been known not to write one entry on this blog for several weeks at a time.

And there's one more reason I blog -- To educate. When I started TRT, there weren't a lot of blogs out there that deal with Taoism and so I wanted to share the concepts of Taoism with others. As time has progressed, I've expanded my educational efforts by adding the topics of fibromyalgia, Klinefelter's Syndrome and Asperger's Syndrome.

Hooray for the Atheists

Bill O'Reilly is in a tizzy. It seems he's mighty upset that, here in Washington State, we uphold the right of free speech. According to the Seattle PI,

An atheist group has unveiled an anti-religion placard in the state Capitol, joining a Christian Nativity scene and "holiday tree" on display during December.

The atheists' sign was installed Monday by Washington members of the Freedom From Religion Foundation, a national group based in Madison, Wis.

With a nod to the winter solstice - the year's shortest day, occurring in late December - the placard reads, in part, "There is only our natural world. Religion is but myth and superstition that hardens hearts and enslaves minds."

If this upsets Billy Boy, then I'm all for it!!

Seriously, why do fundamentalist Christians constantly get all worked up about this kind of stuff? If some of us don't believe in the Christian God, what difference should it make to them? How does our non-belief impact their devout belief? Likewise, if gays and lesbians are allowed by law to marry, how will that impact conservative Christian marriages?

While Christianity, in specific, and religion, in general, are supposed to be based on independent choice, love, peace and respect, one would never know it. All religions produce zealots who think that, if you don't believe as they do, then you should be silenced, persecuted or killed.

And these zealots are laying waste to our world. The Christian zealots want the U.S. to bomb and destroy any nation or people who don't bow down before the Judeo-Christian God. Their counterparts in the Muslim world want to bomb and destroy any nation or people who don't bow down to their incarnation of Allah.

In my book, this is utter madness borne of hardened hearts and enslaved minds.

Helping the Poor...One Truck at a Time

The wife & I were watching the evening news. First, came a story about the escalating unemployment figures with a brief feature on one woman who's been trying to land a full-time job since 2005! Next, we were told about the Big 3 automakers and their plea for a $35 billion bailout. Even the UAW is getting in the act by dropping some of their current demands -- I'm sure they are realizing that small raises are better than no jobs.

On the heels of that story comes an auto dealer in Florida who says he's concerned about working families. To help jump start the economy in his locale, he says, he's offering two new pickup trucks for the price of one. What a deal!!

Of course, there's one itsy bitsy problem with this grand offer -- most WORKING families can't afford a NEW truck! It really doesn't matter if he throws in a second truck or a cruise to Club Med or groceries for one year. Since many working families are living month-to-month, it doesn't matter how enticing a deal such as this looks because you can't buy something when you don't have the money AND the banks aren't lending it.

And let's be brutally honest anyway. This 2 for 1 truck deal is not aimed at working families. No, the target is the upper class, those folks who may be hurting a tad, but not that much.

It's a lot like the various tax breaks and tax incentives that politicians like to chortle about. They will tell you they fought for and voted for such and such a bill because they're on the side of working families. Hey, if you buy a hybrid, we'll give you x number of dollars back. And who can afford the hybrids? It's not the working class!

Install solar panels on your roof and we'll throw money at you. Again, working families have enough trouble scraping together the money to fix a hole in the roof or to get a new composite roof laid. So, few of us will ever see a windfall from installing all those solar panels we can only afford in our dreams.

Where are our tax breaks?

King of Pain

I hurt...a lot! With my version of fibromyalgia, pain is frequent and can affect multiple areas of the body simultaneously. This week the pain has centered in two such areas: my lower back and my sternum. Because of these two areas of pain, movement is difficult and no position is comfortable.

I will see my therapist this afternoon and I know one of the issues we will discuss is depression. Personally, I don't think I'm clinically depressed -- just run-of-the-mill depressed. Pain has a way of making anyone feel a bit down, but I certainly don't feel hopeless nor do I feel a black veil has fallen on my life. I simply grow tired of constant pain and, knowing it will continue to be my lifelong friend, I get a bit blue from time to time.

It's too bad that I'm not a religious sort. If I were, I could rail against my God for my condition! I could lament the unfairness of my lot and ask such questions as "Why me Lord?"

But I don't ask this question. I realize that, because my body wasn't put together the way it was supposed to be, it's rather natural that I am beset by a myriad of physical ailments. The fact that I have a chromosomal abnormality and was born without a fully developed left hip simply means that problems in adult life are to be expected.

I suppose I could question WHY I popped out of the chute in a not ready for prime time fashion. Yes, I could blame this all on me mum and pa! But I realize that the forming of a human life in the womb is a complicated process and, if the timing is off by a slight hair, not everything will go according to schedule.

If you get right down to it what I find the most amazing is that so many babies are born healthy! When one considers all the complex variables that must take place in an ordered sequence, it's amazing that it comes off without a hitch most of the time.

In His Image

I'm not the greatest fan in the world of the Christmas season. For one thing, while Christmas music is okay in small portions, some radio stations play the stuff ad nauseam. I can only listen to Brenda Lee belt out "Rock'n around the Christmas Tree" so many times before I'm ready to scream.

Another part of the holiday season that annoys me to no end is the rampant commercialism. Nothing says I love you like buying crap for friends and family that they don't need! Whatever happened to the idea of living simply so others may simply live?

But the part of the yuletide season that irritates me the most is that non-Christians like myself are beat over the head again and again with Christian stories, symbolism and metaphors. And so, I find myself thinking about the many things about Christianity that rub me the wrong way and you, dear readers, get treated to volumes on the topic (hmm -- another one of my AS compulsions?)

Tonight, we're going to explore the egocentric idea that humankind is created in God's image.

For starters, what does that mean anyway? Is it referring to physical, emotional and/or spiritual characteristics? No one seems to know. Ask ten Christians to explain it and you may get ten different answers.

For the sake of argument, let's say this statement is true. If all humans are created in the image of the all mighty, then why do Christians treat some humans differently than others? Why do some Christians want to kill Muslims (and vice versa)? Why are the poor looked down on? Why are gays persecuted? Why are women subjugated?

If you hold to the belief that everyone is created in the image of God, then that means we all share these same traits.

I want to know why Christians and Jews think that only humans are created in God's image? Since God created everything, wouldn't it stand to reason that all things are created in his image?

The answer to that question is contained in the Bible. It says somewhere in Genesis that ONLY male and female humans are covered my this dictum. Of course, it should be pointed out that Genesis was written by a person and this person obviously has a bias against other things. If the Bible had been written by dogs or butterflies, then I bet only dogs or butterflies would be bestowed with this holy declaration!

Since science has informed us that homo sapiens came to the table late in the game, it would be far more likely that rocks or water or molecules are the more likely recipients of God's image.

In Taoism, there is no distinction amongst the ten thousand things. Every single entity in creation is part of Tao -- you, me, rocks, butterflies, the wind, the rain.

A Grave Situation

Here's a question I've mulled over since I was a wee lad: Why do we stick dead human bodies in the ground? Who thought this up and why did they think it was a good idea? More importantly, why do people still think it's a good idea?

It's always seemed rather counter-intuitive to me. By and large, we don't bury dead cows or dead chickens, so why bury dead humans?

Of course, we no longer just bury dead bodies by themselves. People spend inordinate amounts of money on caskets made of all sorts of materials, several of which aren't particularly biodegradable.

In India, they burn dead bodies on a pyre. In many American Indian cultures, they would leave dead bodies on scaffolds. Often, if someone died at sea, the dead were dumped overboard. But, in America, most people stick dead bodies in a box and bury them.

Wouldn't it make far more sense to farm out all the usable parts to living people in need of them and science for research, then burn the rest to be used as fertilizer or for some other useful purpose? If folks can put fish meal (ground up dead fish) on their gardens, why not people meal?

As long as I've broached this morbid topic, let's take it a step further. I've never understood why so many people insist on open casket funerals. What's the purpose behind looking at a dead body?

If the mortician has done a good job, I've often heard people remark, "She looks so lifelike" or "He looks at peace now". I look at these same bodies and they don't look lifelike nor at peace -- they look dead.

Since most people (though certainly not all) accept the notion that we are more than our bodies -- that something called soul, spirit, essence, force, etc. exists independently -- a body without this something extra is nothing more than a housing.

I remember when my first wife's mother died of cancer. The missus didn't want to view her mother's body, but her siblings convinced her otherwise. They told her she would regret it later IF she didn't say here goodbyes. So, we trooped in to gaze into the open casket.

It turns out her siblings were correct about the regrets -- my wife regretted being talked into something she didn't want to do! She had nightmares for weeks.

When my maternal grandmother died, I was given the task of photographing her body in the open casket. I kept trying to beg off of this because I had no interest whatsoever in taking a peek at her corpse. But my family was under the same misguided position as my former in-laws -- they thought it would be good for me. Needless to say, it wasn't.

I do understand the need to say goodbye to a loved one, but a dead body is not the one you loved. You loved the person inside the body, so why should you feel relieved saying goodbye to a shell? It would be like breaking your favorite vase, then sitting around saying so long to the box it came in.

Celebrating Weirdness

In my last post, I talked about how discombobulating it is to discover you have Asperger's Syndrome (AS). Now I will discuss the other side of the coin.

In a manner of speaking, finding out you have AS is liberating! It means my weirdness is not derived solely from selfishness, arrogance or stubbornness. It means there is a neurological explanation for many of my tendencies and the same is true for many people who have suffered in silence for years or even decades.

It's often difficult when a person has a condition or affliction that does not manifest itself in a change in a person's physical appearance. While I'm certainly not suggesting that life is a bowl of cherries for a person stricken with polio or cerebral palsy, when you encounter such a person, you can immediately see that something is different about them.

However, when a person suffers from a congenital defect (Klinefelter's Syndrome) or an autoimmune disease (fibromyalgia) or a neurological disorder (AS), nothing jumps out to meet the eye. You look to others as a "normal" person. There is no readily available sign that you suffer from one or more differences.

It's not uncommon for friends, family and colleagues -- even many in the medical community -- to think it's "all in your head". Some people will say you're just a malingerer or you are merely seeking attention or you're trying to get out of toeing the line re social expectations. Hear these things enough and you start to question yourself too!!

So, learning that there is an organic cause to your symptoms certainly provides you with better peace of mind. It's not all in your head or it is, but in a physiological sense.

But this sense of liberation comes at a cost. While learning you have a particular condition or malady is good, on the one hand, you have to be ever cognizant that you don't use this discovery to rationalize your behavior to the nth degree. Just because you have AS or Klinefelter, this doesn't give you a license to be a dolt. In other words, you have to be watchful that this label doesn't become a routine excuse for bad behavior.

Regardless of AS, I don't possess a license to hurt or offend others. While this will happen from time to time because of the differences of viewing and interacting with the world, I must learn to make compromises with those around me. While I hope others will learn about the many aspects of AS in terms of how I relate to them, I too need to be a better student of how my actions and words affect others.

I can't simply tread down my path with blinders on and expect others to get out of my way. I can't go through life like a bull in a china shop and, when I do or say something awkward or outside of social norms, merely exclaim, "Hey I have AS or Klinefelter's. It's not my fault."

As my motto states -- on the top left column of this blog -- I am part of the world and the world is part of me -- The One -- Tao. I simply have to figure out my realtion to the world and Tao as an aspie. It's not the easiest assignment I've ever had, but it's one I must complete.

Why Am I So Discombobulated?

Now that I've found that Asperger's Syndrome (AS) provides a definition for the many struggles I've encountered in my life, why has this knowledge so discombobulated me? As my family and friends have pointed out, the traits and aspects that fit under the umbrella of AS have always been part of me. The only difference, they say, is that I now have a label with which to group together what I thought were disparate quirks.

I grant that their is some logic and symmetry to this argument. The me that I know today is the same me I've known since the beginning. I've always accepted that I seem to view the world differently than most people and I react to it differently as well. So, a silly label shouldn't make that big a deal.

While that perspective is rational, it doesn't quite cut it in my book. While I've acknowledged that I do come at things differently, I always thought it was because I'm a philosophical type and that, if others looked at the world through the eyes of the philosopher, they too would see what I see or, at least, something in a similar vein.

To find out that this is not the case at all has taken me aback. These neurological differences are far more than I had originally realized. What this means -- at least from my point of view -- is that many of most basic foundational tenets are based on false premises. I'm not saying that each is necessarily wrong, but each is based on an entirely different set of criteria.

Further, delineating a specific reference point is a form of change and I have never dealt well with change. So, it should be understandable that this whole situation has thrown me for a loop and turned my understanding of my world upside down.

As I've mentioned before, I'm feeling rather lost right now. It's like the tether that's kept me tied down has been torn asunder and I'm wafting about in the wind. I've actually been talking to people around town a lot less because I am now more conscious that I often say the wrong thing at the wrong time or that I habitually miss routine social clues. I certainly don't go out as often as I used to (which isn't saying much) and I rarely speak to any of my neighbors.

In a way, I've decided to hibernate. Until I can get a better handle on these new revelations, I don't have any interest whatsoever in being even nominally social. I've never been a social creature anyway, but I'm now becoming something of a hermit!

At some point, I may venture out again to engage the world. If do though, I already know it will be under different parameters.

Up and until I attended Grad School in the early 90s, I accepted the fact that I marched to a radically different drummer. I was not a joiner. If I found a particular community project or program that interested me, I would definitely get involved, but on my own terms. Once it ended, I would go back to my cave.

During Grad School, I decided to try the other tact -- to BE a joiner. I joined lots of radical and progressive groups and became one of the leaders of several of them. My ongoing participation was always marked by my quirky mannerisms and behavior, but progressive activists accepted these quirks because I was such a hard and dedicated worker.

But try as I might, I continually found myself in the middle of organizational controversies. I seem to be the kind of person that either you love to death or you absolutely detest and loathe. There appears to be no middle ground. For every comrade-in-arms there was also a devout enemy, even though I accept that there's good and bad in each and every person.

So, I've decided to go back to the way it was before -- to be a non-joiner. I simply don't seem to have the ability to avoid causing or worsening imbroglios. In essence, I don't plan to be a leader OR a follower. I'll just keep to my own path and, if it intersects with others from time to time, we can then work together on very specific tasks.

As a Taoist, I still hold firm to the belief that all things, including me, are connected to everything else. I am simply choosing to view these connections from a little farther back than before.

More importantly, as should be evident to long time readers, I'm going to put a lot more energy into this blog. Since I seem better equipped to communicate via the written word than its spoken counterpart, this blog will offer the opportunity to stay engaged in the issues I'm most interested in.

It is my sincere hope that my frankness in discussing my personal struggles with AS, Klinefelter's and fibromyalgia will, at least, allow others who share these or similar diagnoses to know that they are not stranded alone on a strange planet.

Just Plain Wet

I've always liked numbers. In grade school, I was always near or at the top of my class in speed and accuracy in arithmetic. What often drove my classmates crazy was that, even at a very young age, I could work out the figures in my head. Mind you, I didn't always arrive at the answers utilizing the tools and formulas we were taught, but I arrived there quickly nonetheless.

While numbers, in general, and arithmetic, in specific, seemed to come easy to me, the same cannot be said for algebra, calculus and trigonometry! After having been a math star in grades 1 - 6, I proceeded to fail algebra in 9th grade. To this very day, algebra is like trying to understand Chinese via a German-speaking tutor. No matter how hard I studied, it simply made no sense to me whatsoever.

Of all the various math expressions, I've always liked figuring out the mean (i.e., the average). As a child I collected sports cards -- over 15,000 baseball cards. I would spend hours computing all sorts of averages: number of triples, doubles, walks, strikeouts, etc. per year and then comparing these results amongst different players and teams. Since I had few friends, I needed something to occupy my time!!

While I no longer follow sports that rigorously, I still find other areas to compare mathematically. Since I live in an area that receives copious amounts of precipitation each year, one of my new preoccupations is comparing rainfall totals for different areas.

This is a lead up to the fact that it rained bucket loads in South Bend during the month of November. Two towns I've lived in before -- Pendleton and Bend, OR -- average 13.95" and 11.73" respectively of precip per year and most of that comes in the form of snow. Seattle, WA -- known throughout the country as a rainy city -- averages 16.97" in aggregate for the months November, December and January.

For the month of November, South Bend received 20.73" of rain -- that's a daily average of 0.69". That total is nearly 4" more than Seattle receives in the aforementioned quarter and loads more than Pendleton or Bend receive in 12 full months!

Even when compared with other locales I've lived in (Kansas City, MO - 35.51" or Hot Springs, AR - 57.69"), this is still a whopping total.

But the interesting thing is that we've had virtually no flooding. The ecosystem here is used to lots of rain and so the surrounding countryside just seems to soak it up. Had this amount fallen in any of the other areas cited, I'm sure it would be national news of severe flooding, destruction of property and loss of life.

Today is the first day of December and, not surprisingly, it's raining.

Try Shutting Up

Since the beginning of time, humankind has searched for and theorized about a process, principle or entity that binds us together. Many believe this "IT" is a benevolent being that is concerned about our welfare and casts a hand over our lives. Others accept the notion of one or more beings, but do not buy-in to its necessary benevolence.

By and large, Taoists don't envision a being at all. For most of us, the IT is a process, principle or force that is neither benevolent nor malevolent. IT just is. Everything is part of IT -- there is no separation. If you want to find IT, many a Taoist will suggest you need only look in the mirror!

Apart from defining what IT might be, western religious thought and Taoism differ greatly on how each of us might engage IT. In Christianity, the principle way followers are supposed to dial into IT is via prayer.

There are all kinds of prayers, many committed to rote memorization. However, while followers are encouraged strongly to use the established prayers and creeds, they are also told that a simple "conversation" with the all mighty will suffice. Some people pray out loud, while others hold these conversations in their heads.

For me, the problem with this approach is that, if you spend all your time flapping your gums, how are you to hear the message? Wouldn't you worry that you and the deity might end up talking over one another? How will you know when the voice inside your noggin changes from you to IT?

Taoists approach this concept from the opposite perspective! In Taoism, there is no such animal as an established creed or prayer. You don't need to get in a certain position nor do you have to face a particular direction. All that is required is that you empty yourself completely.

Empty, you become a vessel to be filled.

Empty is not the same thing as merely being quiet. If we want to dial in to Tao (our word for IT), then we must flush away all words, thoughts, images and emotions. If you don't completely empty yourself, then all these things and more become barriers to getting in touch. They block the flow of energy.

A filled vessel -- one crammed full of words, ideas, suppositions, images and emotions -- cannot be filled with the spirit simply because there is no room. By the same token, you can't pour more water into a full glass. The new water will spill on the floor and be wasted.

So, when we approach IT we must ensure we strip away all our wants, needs and desires for it is these very things that block our access. We each need to learn the lesson that shutting up is the only way we can clear the space that can then be filled up.

A Possible Link?

One of the great advantages of using tracking software or services with a blog or other website is the kind of information one can glean from it. For example, I use SiteMeter and I can check it any time of the day or night to see where visitors hail from or the referring url. Earlier today I noticed that a visitor from England came to The Rambling Taoist as the result of a search on Google with the search terms of "klinefelter and asperger".

I followed the link and discovered a recent study published this past March that suggests there may be a link between these two syndromes. Because I have both, this is a very interesting potential development!

The high levels of autism traits in XXY men suggest that Klinefelter syndrome may be associated with an increased genetic vulnerability for autistic features. Interestingly, our finding of high rates of autistic traits across all dimensions of the autism phenotype suggest that vulnerability for autistic features in Klinefelter syndrome may not be restricted to impairments in social behavior and communication, but may extend to other aspects of the phenotype as well. Although this observation suggests that XXY men may display the specific combination of various individual traits that are all part of the autism phenotype, some of the traits and symptoms of autism are not specific for the autism phenotype, but may also be seen in individuals with other psychiatric disorders. Therefore, it is possible that men with Klinefelter may not only have an increased vulnerability for autism, but also for other psychiatric disorders.

In addition, I've read before -- though I don't have the citations offhand -- that there are some indications that those with Klinefelter's have a greater propensity for auto-immune disorders. So, the underlying root cause of my fibromyalgia and Asperger's Syndrome may be the abnormaility in my 26th chromosone.