Monday, August 30, 2010

The American Theocracy - Number Seven

You shall not commit adultery.
~ Exodus 20:14, RSV ~
Application: Laws would be passed to make adultery illegal and punishable by the theocratic court. Current laws on pornography (adultery in the heart) would be strengthened and, under this guise, the government would move to regulate the internet. Only permissible Christian-based websites and blogs would be allowed to continue operation. Stiffer penalties against common prostitutes would be included as well.

Exceptions: As mentioned previously, men convicted of adultery would be fined, but women (those temptresses of God-fearing men!) would be subject to the death penalty.

Church and government leaders would be exempt from punishment under the pornography laws because, well, they need a way to blow off steam after a day spent running the free world, for God's sake!!

While streetwalkers would be subject to heavy fines and long prison sentences, officials would look the other way when it came to high-class call girls -- you know, the ones they have liaisons with before heading home to embrace their "family values"?

In another interesting twist, a presidential Executive Order would be drawn up to shield all clergy from criminal and civil charges in relation to the sexual abuse of minors. Instead of punishing them for their misdeeds and "sins of the flesh," they merely would be transferred to a different church in another region. Hmm. Sort of like they do now!

If you're interested in reading more from this tongue-in-cheek series, go to the The American Theocracy Index page.

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