The Xin-Xin Ming IV: Senseless Weariness

Scott Bradley

". . . the burdensome practice of judging brings annoyance and weariness. What benefit is derived from attachment to distinctions and separations?"
"When the fundamental nature of things is not recognized the mind's essential peace is disturbed to no avail."

Smoking more, but enjoying it less? Lucky Strikes used to claim themselves to be the remedy. Needless to say, they weren't interested in discussing the heart of the problem: addiction.

I don't know that I am judging more, but I am certainly enjoying it less. What a burden! What weariness! Perhaps I am judging more — judging myself for judging — as if changing brands would make a difference. Here indeed is a vicious and descending spiral of weariness.

And what does it accomplish? What "benefit" is derived? It's all to "no avail". This is the great irony. I rail against the Republicans, disturb my peace, and . . . nothing has changed. No one is saved. No one is convinced. The world goes on as before. Only I have made myself miserable and added just one more bit of harmful stress to my poor abused body.

Judging is indeed a strange addiction.

And I haven't even considered the consequence to the abused other. What have I sowon? Discord? Yes, but harmony is just an ephemeral virtue. Much more visceral is the burdensome response of anger and subsequent weariness I have orchestrated in the other. And I have in effect shortened the life of that other. I have blown secondhand smoke right up his nose.

Somehow being right just doesn't seem so right anymore.

What an addiction!

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