...nobody dies from lack of sex. It's lack of love we die from.In all candor, when I was in my 20s, the very thought of a lack of physical intimacy in later life sounded like a death sentence. I think this sentiment is typical of males and it wouldn't surprise me in the least if twenty-something females thought so as well.
~ from The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood ~
In many ways, our society is over-sexed. Sexual prowess is seen as a virtue. Sensuality is utilized to sell everything from cars to clothes to toothpaste. The sex act itself is on display everywhere in almost every medium imaginable. If you don't treat copulation as one of your chief goals in life, many folks will say that something's wrong with you.
As I've aged, however, I have come to understand the point of Atwood's main character. While I certainly wouldn't deny that sexual intercourse tends to be a pleasurable experience, love is far more important. This is not to suggest that a person can't have both, but, if I had to choose one over the other, love would win out easily.
As my body continues to breakdown, physical intimacy isn't as easy to arrange as it use to be. What has surprised me is that I realize I can live without it and still be happy. I love my wife dearly and I often find it just as pleasurable sitting in the same room with her talking over the day's activities in front of a roaring fire.
I can imagine a life without much, if any, sexual gratification, but not one without the deep and abiding love of those closest to me.
Of course, some traditional Taoist practices suggest that too much sex, at least for men, may be debilitating, depleting jing.
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