When I was born I was completely happy with my face as I didn't think about it. When I was a teenager I was not, it had spots. Now I'm older I don't think about it. Except just now ending this thought.
When my parents got me an old 2nd hand bike I was completely happy with it, over the moon, I'd go everywhere on it. When I was a teenager I had a really cool bike I'd bought myself, I was not happy with this bike as there were so many other ones on offer. Now I just ride an old bike, 2 wheels is good enough for me, no frills required.
When I borrowed my wife's iPhone I thought "I just don't need this thing" but I got hooked on one simple game on the phone, it was fun! Now due to work and life I have my own Android phone and the hundreds of games on offer stun me with the inability to choose one at all, and when I do I'm dissatisfied with it. I'm about to leave the teenage phase and take the adult perspective again "I don't need this thing!".
When a sad person considers their life they say "I don't like my X" "I made a bad choice with Y" "Why can't I have a Z?". When a happy person considers life they say "actually I don't think about it".
Overwhelming choice is, overwhelming, and leads to dissatisfaction. When your only meal is rice and dried mushroom, and you're hungry, you eat it like it were the best meal you'd ever had. When you sit in the best restaurant money can pay for and choose from the most amazing menu you've ever seen, you're in line for dissatisfaction. "Waiter, this Matsutake salad is slightly too khaki in colour when it should be buff, take it back at once!"
The simple life is promoted by Taoist philosophy, can you see why?
You can check out Ta-Wan's other musings here.
I'm not sure the problem is about all the available choices, but about satisfaction. My mother-in-law, a very sensible and simple person who had never heard of the Tao, used to say the secret to happiness is not getting what you want, but being satisfied with what you get. I think when people think happiness comes in the form of things, they always want something else or more. I don't think rejection (of your phone or your salad) or limiting your choices is the answer; it's to recognize it's just a phone among many. And there'll be another salad to try tomorrow. Just pick something and live with it. I am thinking somewhat of Herb Simon's concept of "satisficing" decisions.
ReplyDeleteI see we agree. Your point seemed a rewording of mine.
ReplyDeleteNote I'll nearly always be using fictional versions of events to make points and not my own life stories.
Feeling you have a choice is one trap of many. Your aunty and I agree.
*your mother in law
ReplyDeleteYeah, after I wrote that, I thought, "but I'm saying the same thing." And my mother-in-law/aunty doesn't care...she's dead. You just made me think of her and her wonderful attitude about things.
ReplyDelete