Monday, March 21, 2011

The Next Step

Thus far, all my various medical tests have shown is that I have malformed sinuses (which I already knew). No tumors or lesions appeared on my brain plus there is no indication that I have some sort of seizure disorder. Consequently, my issues with auditory and visual hallucinations as well as paraphasia are all in my mind.

In some ways, I am kind of disappointed. Mind you, I'm not saying that I wanted my doctor to tell me I had a tumor the size of a basketball in my head, but physical issues often are easier to deal with and treat. If there is a tumor, you try to cut it out (or radiate it). If you have an infection, you take antibiotics. If you break a bone or tear a ligament, you fix the problem and then immobilize the affected area, if possible.

But a screwed up mind is a different animal altogether. It's not uncommon for the problems to be locked away in a person's psyche and the various medical and/or mental health practitioners try to guess -- for lack of a better word -- the precise nature of the problem and what might remedy it.

I have an appointment with my counselor today and one of the topics I'm sure we will discuss (this week or next) is the possibility of being referred to a psychiatrist. One of the reasons for such a referral will be to explore the possibility of placing me on some medication.

Of course, this would represent a very anxious stage for me because I have a distinct phobia re medications. Whenever I have had to take something in the past, one of two things typically has occurred: 1) The medication has the opposite of the desired effect (e.g., as a young teenager I was prescribed tranquilizers which, unfortunately, only hyped me up more!) or 2) I become convinced that, whatever the known side effects are, I have them in spades!!

Oh, but I'm getting ahead of myself...as I'm prone to do. I simply need to take this next step and deal with the situation once my foot comes down.

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