Wednesday, January 26, 2011

The Art of Humping

Humans, we're told, sit at the top of the evolutionary ladder. We are the ones made in the image of God. We hold dominion over all of the creatures of this world. If this supposition is questioned, one line trotted out to support this unfounded contention is that humans make l-o-v-e, while animals simply instinctively procreate.

We have entire industries that celebrate -- and often times objectify -- lovemaking. There are books, movies, instructional tapes, podcasts, YouTube videos as well as stories and techniques handed down from generation to generation. In many ways, we herald the act of copulation as an art form and it is this purported artistic expression that places us far and above the other critters mired in the muck of routinized existence.

Here's my question: How in the heck do we know if our forms of sexual endeavors are any better or worse than two dogs humping?

Well, some people will opine, making love involves fondling, caressing, kissing and a deep caring for another human being. What other creature shows this level of compassionate involvement?

Are you kidding me? Have you ever watched the mating rituals of birds, mammals or other types of animal life? They strut. They parade. Many animals put on a show that would put almost any human to shame. While many of these gestures do not involve actual touching, who is to say it does not spark great arousal and the truest sense of bonding, two creatures becoming one?

Okay, some folks will admit, you could have a point there, but animals don't express their love for each other verbally like people do. You never see a peacock or a grizzly bear yell out in the throes of ecstasy, "Oh baby, oh baby" or "Who's your daddy?" or "Thank you Jesus!" Many of them look entirely disinterested and/or rarely make a sound.

So what? Maybe they don't need to go through such histrionics to share their satisfaction. Maybe prairie dogs or wallabies look at human mating rituals and think to themselves, "What a primitive species!"

The thing that gets me is that, despite all of our advancements in so-called knowledge, no human has ever been able to communicate with another species on their own terms. We have no idea what thoughts run through their heads. We have no clue as to how each species views the world. Yet, in spite of this dearth of comprehension, we think we know what makes the rest of the world tick.

How egocentric is that?!

I don't know if two dogs humping equates to two human beings making love. It may or it may not. But I'm quite okay with admitting I don't know the answer.

Why do we humans feel the need to place all life forms in hierarchies? Why do we humans feel the need to state that what we do and how we do it represents the best way to get things done? Why do we humans feel the need to believe that it is our species that is closest to a divine creator?

Why can't we simply accept that each form has its own way, its own path, and that none is better nor worse than any other?

5 comments:

  1. Not completely to the point, but there is an intriguing article in Jan-Feb issue of Atlantic Monthly on how internet porn has and has not changed sex (particularly for women,) or "The Art of Humping."

    One thing for certain, dogs don't create porn (although there is certainly porn that features dogs...)

    My cat, The Yellow Emperor, is enjoying my big new TV...I wonder what he would think of "kitty porn." And another of my cats, who was neutered, used to get it on with certain objects.

    This is gonna raise your traffic statistics!

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  2. And actually, cats do get kinda histrionic; big cats especially appear to like rough sex and over an extended period of time. Lion love!

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  3. This is really funny and insightful. Keep it up!

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