A few years ago -- when my disability had increased to the extent that working at a job was no longer realistic nor feasible -- I was at a bit of a loss as to what to do next. Much of our adult lives is defined by our vocation and I suddenly no longer had one. My deteriorating body meant I couldn't enjoy a lot of physical activities either. Even worse, unlike the majority of my peers, I was neither a grandparent nor a parent. So, I couldn't turn my attention to my nonexistent children or grandchildren.
I initially tried to become involved with a lot of progressive nonprofit groups, but this proved to be very problematic. As a socially awkward person, it was very, very stressful for me and I seemed to be a lightening rod for controversy. Therefore, when I stepped back even from this, I was again left with a bewilderment of what I planned to do with the rest of my life.
This blog was begun in 2005 and I had nurtured it in an on-again, off-again fashion for the first few years. I'd write a lot of posts for a period of time, then I'd allow it to go a bit dormant, before picking it up again. It dawned on me in late 2008 that the blog itself could become my avocation. It would provide a mechanism for me to stay in touch with the world without the worry of direct social interaction. The blog could also serve as the outlet for one ability I've enjoyed throughout my entire life: writing.
And so, this blog has become a focal point in my life. It serves as one of my chief motivations to climb out of bed every morning! :-)
Now that I pen several posts per day (plus formatting the wonderful prose of Scott Bradley!), I've found there are days here and there in which I don't feel much like writing, but I write nonetheless. It's no different from you working stiffs out there. There are days you don't feel like showing up for work, but you show up anyway.
In order to become more proficient in a craft, it is important to practice one's craft in all sorts of circumstances. We learn far less about ourselves if we only commit to activities when the juices are flowing or we feel like doing it. Sometimes, putting our minds to a task, when we'd rather not, produces unexpectedly fantastic results.
On most days, there are a multitude of posts I can write. The trick is to decide which one's generate the greatest passion in me that day. It seems that everything I read, watch or experience eagerly wants to become the fodder for a blog post. I sift through these many thoughts to choose a few to write about.
Of course, I run into periods of time in which the same stimuli surround me, but nothing seems to spark the urge to come to my keyboard to peck out the next post. It could be that I'm tired, dealing with a lot of pain and/or stress, or I'm just sort of in a down mood. At such times, I struggle to select topics and then I struggle to find the right words.
If my goal is to become a more proficient writer and philosopher, I simply have to push through those times. It's a work in progress. Some days I do better than others. I do know, however, that some of my best posts -- at least, in MY unbiased opinion -- have come on those days when I least felt like writing.
It is a lot like life, in general. Some of our best times can occur on those days when we didn't want to roll out of bed. It only proves that we can't begin to pretend that we know what life has in store for us...unless we commit to living it!
I initially tried to become involved with a lot of progressive nonprofit groups, but this proved to be very problematic. As a socially awkward person, it was very, very stressful for me and I seemed to be a lightening rod for controversy. Therefore, when I stepped back even from this, I was again left with a bewilderment of what I planned to do with the rest of my life.
This blog was begun in 2005 and I had nurtured it in an on-again, off-again fashion for the first few years. I'd write a lot of posts for a period of time, then I'd allow it to go a bit dormant, before picking it up again. It dawned on me in late 2008 that the blog itself could become my avocation. It would provide a mechanism for me to stay in touch with the world without the worry of direct social interaction. The blog could also serve as the outlet for one ability I've enjoyed throughout my entire life: writing.
And so, this blog has become a focal point in my life. It serves as one of my chief motivations to climb out of bed every morning! :-)
Now that I pen several posts per day (plus formatting the wonderful prose of Scott Bradley!), I've found there are days here and there in which I don't feel much like writing, but I write nonetheless. It's no different from you working stiffs out there. There are days you don't feel like showing up for work, but you show up anyway.
In order to become more proficient in a craft, it is important to practice one's craft in all sorts of circumstances. We learn far less about ourselves if we only commit to activities when the juices are flowing or we feel like doing it. Sometimes, putting our minds to a task, when we'd rather not, produces unexpectedly fantastic results.
On most days, there are a multitude of posts I can write. The trick is to decide which one's generate the greatest passion in me that day. It seems that everything I read, watch or experience eagerly wants to become the fodder for a blog post. I sift through these many thoughts to choose a few to write about.
Of course, I run into periods of time in which the same stimuli surround me, but nothing seems to spark the urge to come to my keyboard to peck out the next post. It could be that I'm tired, dealing with a lot of pain and/or stress, or I'm just sort of in a down mood. At such times, I struggle to select topics and then I struggle to find the right words.
If my goal is to become a more proficient writer and philosopher, I simply have to push through those times. It's a work in progress. Some days I do better than others. I do know, however, that some of my best posts -- at least, in MY unbiased opinion -- have come on those days when I least felt like writing.
It is a lot like life, in general. Some of our best times can occur on those days when we didn't want to roll out of bed. It only proves that we can't begin to pretend that we know what life has in store for us...unless we commit to living it!
Same here, bro.
ReplyDeleteThere is so little I can "physically" do these days. I don't like it. Some days I cry over it.
But, blogging allows me to do what I can . I take it seriously. I see it as an important aspect and function of my life. I am grateful people read what I write and I am even more grateful that readership numbers continue to climb. Is ti wrong to say I find satisfaction in that, may even validation?
Now, if I could just turn blogging into 30 grand a year. :)
Bruce
I am sure glad to decide to right, as I have greatly benefit from your craft.
ReplyDeleteBut this post is particularly touching in that I'm reaching the point of having to decide what to do with my life. Thank you for writing it.
My pain-free days are fewer and fewer, so working is becoming non-feasible for me. I keep hoping for improvement thought...!
Bruce,
ReplyDeleteWe each need to find validation in something, so why not a blog?
Lorena,
Keep plugging away. Life itself is a number of searches. What may resonate one day may not the next.
And remember, you too have a most excellent blog which can certainly provide you with an outlet!!
You are an inspiration. I like to write but haven't found that discipline yet. But you're right, I just have to decide that I will do it every day. Maybe then something will come of it. Your post is right on, thanks for writing.
ReplyDelete