As I travel around the blogosphere and leave comments on blog posts that speak to me, one response always puzzles me. I've never understood why blog hosts feel the need to thank anyone for leaving a comment.
To me, one of the whole purposes of having a public blog is to write stuff and then, if members of the reading public seem so moved, they can respond via the comments section. What is there to be thankful for re this transaction?
If we should each be thankful anytime someone says or writes something to us, then why don't we start every conversation with thanking the other person or persons for agreeing to converse with us in the first place?
To me, one of the whole purposes of having a public blog is to write stuff and then, if members of the reading public seem so moved, they can respond via the comments section. What is there to be thankful for re this transaction?
If we should each be thankful anytime someone says or writes something to us, then why don't we start every conversation with thanking the other person or persons for agreeing to converse with us in the first place?
Bill: Hi Sue!
Sue: Why thank you, Bill, for saying hello.
Bill: Well, thank you for thanking me.
Sue: I can't thank you enough for thanking me for thanking you.
Bill: I'm equally thankful that you thanked me for thanking you for thanking me.
Sue: I'm just so thankful...
Now, I realize that this may be something that doesn't compute in my aspie-infused brain; it may well make sense to the vast majority of the populace. Generally speaking, if I ask someone to do something for me and they do it, I see this as an appropriate reason to be thankful. If, on the other hand, someone offers something that is unsolicited by me, then I may well appreciate the act, but I am not thankful for it; no expectation was involved.
Since it's rather obvious I deviate from the norm on this topic, maybe a few of you would be so gracious as to enlighten me on this matter. What types of words or actions do you express thanks for and which do you do not?
Should I write "Thank you" in advance?
Since it's rather obvious I deviate from the norm on this topic, maybe a few of you would be so gracious as to enlighten me on this matter. What types of words or actions do you express thanks for and which do you do not?
Should I write "Thank you" in advance?
Well... "Thanks" for raising that issue... :-)
ReplyDeleteI'm stumped on that one too and I usually tend to respond only if I'm asked a direct question or if I've got something good to contribute.
I like to think that my commentors feel like they can contribute without me having to put my stamp all over it.
And to think that some people think Aspies are devoid of a sense of humor! I've found that we are very funny people in our own way. You've written many a thing on your blog that has made me chuckle. :)
ReplyDeleteAs to the last part of your comment, I couldn't agree more. Often I don't offer a response because it would feel as if I'm intruding...on my own blog. That's sort of funny too, if you think about it.
I can tell you why people write these "thank yous". It's because in every "build a successful blog" handbook they say to always reply to every comment. And the easiest way to do that is to say thanks. Sometimes you'll see other responses that add no value, just basically repeat what the commenter said. That's my other pet peeve.
ReplyDeleteWhen I see people doing this, I'm almost immediately turned off because it tells me they are as worried (or more worried) about building a blog readership base as they are about writing legitimately thoughtful content.
You needn't worry about this, though. You have more great content than I can keep up with...
I'm an Aspie too and tend to over compensate by saying thank you way too much. For everything I'm thanking people repeatedly. I guess deep down I just don't understand when to thank and when not to so take the easy route of always doing it. I'd like to be able to stop it but don't seem able to.
ReplyDeleteI fully agree with what your saying about blog posts.
TJ,
ReplyDeleteThere are handbooks on creating successful blogs? I don't suppose that they would suggest focusing on an off-the-beaten-path topic like Taoism. Good thing I didn't read one before starting this blog. :-D
FeralPawn,
Unlike you, I probably under compensate by not saying thank you enough...for the same reason of bewilderment.
I tend to say "thank you" or "thanks" more often than a normal person would, because I am afraid that might be what is expected and if it is ever expected and not received, the person will be offended and furious. So if I ever write an email, especially to a superior, it is a good chance I will close it out with "thanks". But on a blog it would seem superficial *just* to say "thanks".
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, it would seem reasonable to be thankful for some things that are not expected. If someone unexpectedly gave me a million dollars, I would probably thank him sincerely.