Tomorrow is Father's Day. As I went through the time-honored tradition of picking out a card for dear 'ol dad, I looked for one that did not include the inane message Best or Greatest Dad in the World. It's not that I have gripes with my dad; we have a very good relationship. We talk nearly every week by phone -- some weeks we talk more than once.
For me, the issue with proclaiming any dad as best or greatest is that it begs the question: Compared to what? All the dads a person has had throughout their life? (Note: I've had one. He's it.) All other human fathers? All dads of all species?
You see, it's difficult to compare one person you know really well with other people you know from afar. My dad certainly is far from perfect -- don't know of a dad who is. I've seen him when he's been doing well and when he's not been doing so well. I've been a party to his many highs and lows. And he can say the same about me!!
Other fathers may seem better in some regards, but unless you know them intimately as a son or daughter, appearances often can be quite deceiving. The dad who seems in public to be Mr. Everything may be a pedophile, spouse abuser, scam artist or emotionally-distant father up close and personal. Besides, any other father is not my father and I don't judge him by such external criteria.
He's a man with strengths and weaknesses. He and my step-mother have been strong supporters of Della and I. He's shared with me his time, energy, love and wisdom. He's been like a close friend and confidante for many, many years.
Is he the best and greatest or the worst and sorriest?
Nope. He's just MY DAD.
Happy Father's Day!!!
For me, the issue with proclaiming any dad as best or greatest is that it begs the question: Compared to what? All the dads a person has had throughout their life? (Note: I've had one. He's it.) All other human fathers? All dads of all species?
You see, it's difficult to compare one person you know really well with other people you know from afar. My dad certainly is far from perfect -- don't know of a dad who is. I've seen him when he's been doing well and when he's not been doing so well. I've been a party to his many highs and lows. And he can say the same about me!!
Other fathers may seem better in some regards, but unless you know them intimately as a son or daughter, appearances often can be quite deceiving. The dad who seems in public to be Mr. Everything may be a pedophile, spouse abuser, scam artist or emotionally-distant father up close and personal. Besides, any other father is not my father and I don't judge him by such external criteria.
He's a man with strengths and weaknesses. He and my step-mother have been strong supporters of Della and I. He's shared with me his time, energy, love and wisdom. He's been like a close friend and confidante for many, many years.
Is he the best and greatest or the worst and sorriest?
Nope. He's just MY DAD.
Happy Father's Day!!!
I appreciate the logic presented here. It really is true that no one can really claim their dad to be the best without first experiencing every father as a dad first. On the other hand, the flip side is also true. Every dad can be considered the "best" also. Check out this post I did on "the Best" a while back and see if you agree.
ReplyDeletehttp://adapt2whatis.blogspot.com/2008/10/youre-best.html
In the post you cite, you wrote, "The best is the higher power within in you. It can never leave you because it is what remains when all else is taken away. It is you."
ReplyDeleteFrom a Taoist perspective, the core essence of all being would not be described as higher or lower, best or worse. It simply is without any manner of qualification. If I had to use a word to describe it, I guess I would pick "purity".