As I've chronicled here, the last few months have been difficult for me due to my failing left hip and my ailing right shoulder. My hip is entering the final phases of its life within my body and, sometime in the not so distant future, it will need to be replaced. My shoulder is missing a key ligament which has led to instability and impingement (a fancy way of stating that movement causes a lot of pain).
I've been so preoccupied with these two hot spots -- as well as getting used to life with dentures -- that I had sort of forgotten that I have fibromyalgia. This past week my body has reminded me of this fact as I'm in the middle of a really nasty flare. Due to all the pain issues, I have been writing less substantive content and allowing Scott's prose to occupy center stage.
While I've been feeling downright miserable for the past two weeks, I haven't fallen prone to the oh so typical human penchant for staring at the heavens and screaming, "Why me? What did I do to deserve this fate?" In fact, I can't remember a time when I have asked this question.
Life isn't easy and each being must deal with travails. It's all part of this realm of existence.
The trees in this ecosystem of southwest Washington must deal with torrential rains and mighty windstorms. They must withstand being battered and blown hither and yon. Do the trees look to the heavens to cry out, "Why me?"
The new native plants my wife and I have planted in our front yard must deal with the constant specter of weeds growing in their midst -- weeds that try to overtake and choke them out before they can become established. These plants must also deal with our foraging wildlife that nips their leaves and gobbles down their fruit. Does the salmonberry bush or the dogwood sapling cry out to the sun, "Why me?"
Everywhere we look -- in any situation or locale -- life is a struggle. Each being must grapple with external and internal forces. Though we humans like to think we stand above the fray, we are smack dab in the middle of it. We can't escape the struggle any more than a field mouse or a mighty cedar can.
The ONLY thing we can control in this regard is our own attitude. While I would certainly like it if I didn't have to deal with so much chronic pain, I accept it for what it is. I understand that -- for whatever reason -- my body was not put together very well and pain has and will continue to be my constant companion. Instead of laying around feeling sorry for myself, I accept the pain for what it is and utilize it to gain insight and wisdom.
One of these insights is that asking the question, "Why me?" is a waste of energy.
This post is part of a series. For an introduction, go here.
I've been so preoccupied with these two hot spots -- as well as getting used to life with dentures -- that I had sort of forgotten that I have fibromyalgia. This past week my body has reminded me of this fact as I'm in the middle of a really nasty flare. Due to all the pain issues, I have been writing less substantive content and allowing Scott's prose to occupy center stage.
While I've been feeling downright miserable for the past two weeks, I haven't fallen prone to the oh so typical human penchant for staring at the heavens and screaming, "Why me? What did I do to deserve this fate?" In fact, I can't remember a time when I have asked this question.
Life isn't easy and each being must deal with travails. It's all part of this realm of existence.
The trees in this ecosystem of southwest Washington must deal with torrential rains and mighty windstorms. They must withstand being battered and blown hither and yon. Do the trees look to the heavens to cry out, "Why me?"
The new native plants my wife and I have planted in our front yard must deal with the constant specter of weeds growing in their midst -- weeds that try to overtake and choke them out before they can become established. These plants must also deal with our foraging wildlife that nips their leaves and gobbles down their fruit. Does the salmonberry bush or the dogwood sapling cry out to the sun, "Why me?"
Everywhere we look -- in any situation or locale -- life is a struggle. Each being must grapple with external and internal forces. Though we humans like to think we stand above the fray, we are smack dab in the middle of it. We can't escape the struggle any more than a field mouse or a mighty cedar can.
The ONLY thing we can control in this regard is our own attitude. While I would certainly like it if I didn't have to deal with so much chronic pain, I accept it for what it is. I understand that -- for whatever reason -- my body was not put together very well and pain has and will continue to be my constant companion. Instead of laying around feeling sorry for myself, I accept the pain for what it is and utilize it to gain insight and wisdom.
One of these insights is that asking the question, "Why me?" is a waste of energy.
This post is part of a series. For an introduction, go here.
As always, I love your insight. I'm curious about one thing. You say - the only thing we can control is our attitude. I've considered mental disabilities (depression, anxiety, etc) similar to unfortunate things like diseases and chronic pain - so in that regard, is attitude something we really can control?
ReplyDeleteI've lately felt like the answer is no, but I'd love your opinion on the matter.
I happen to be a very anxious person! In fact, I have Social Anxiety Disorder. Still, my attitude toward this disorder is something I can control, if I try hard enough.
ReplyDeleteIf I try to fight it -- go against my internal nature -- all that this causes is for me to work myself up into a lather. So lately I've come to accept it for what it is (a change in attitude). I realize that certain things tend to make me anxious and I accept the fact that I will become anxious as opposed to telling/berating myself for being who I am.
Some 45 years ago I found myself in the middle of the conflict in SE Asia. I woke to an ancient face looking me in the eyes. Others were doing something to my right bloody leg.
ReplyDeleteThe face of the ancient woman leaning over me kept saying 'THE PAIN IS IN YOUR LEG, YOUR MIND IS CALM".
Sounds like a very wise woman. I hope it helped you through that ordeal. The fact that you are sharing this memory tells me that it probably did!
ReplyDeleteThamks, and it has helped Trey! It set me on a life long journey that crossed paths with friends and memories i havent touched in lifetimes...that seed led to naving The Rambling Taoist! Thanks for your insights Trey!
ReplyDelete