Ill-Gotten Gains

If we look at the history of the American empire, it seems that ill-gotten gains are nothing to be ashamed of. If you're unfamiliar with the term, ill-gotten means "obtained in an evil manner or by dishonest means". In other words, your gains were garnered in an unscrupulous or immoral way and, if justice is to be served, said gains should be taken away from you so that you cannot benefit from them. Yet, time and time again, it doesn't appear to work that way.

It's a well-known fact -- both then AND now -- that many of the captains of American industry arose to their place on the throne through less than ethical means. Many of these titans stole, lied, killed, bribed, extorted, embezzled and intimidated their way to the top. Despite engaging in all these no-nos, such people were feted and hailed as "successful businessmen". Today, their progeny continue to reap innumerable benefits from these past (and ongoing) ill-gotten gains.

One of the odd aspects of the general American character is the lionization of crooks and robbers. Folks such as Jesse James, William Bonney (Billy the Kid), Bonnie & Clyde, John Dillinger and Al Capone became heroes in the eyes of millions of Americans for stealing from and killing people. Their lifestyles -- some opulent, others not -- were almost exclusively from ill-gotten gains, yet this fact didn't dim their stature at all in the eyes of a large portion of the public.

A third example of the celebration of ill-gotten gains concerns the conservative viewpoint on torture of "enemy combatants" and the unethical acts or behavior of law enforcement when interrogating suspects. In the conservative (often, Christian fundamentalist) mind, any information extracted is a-ok under these suspect circumstances.

It just strikes me as decidedly odd that, in a nation whose ethos reflects that of the Judeo-Christian perspective, ill-gotten gains would be treated in such a celebrated fashion. Remember, we non-believers are constantly being reminded of the divine importance of the 10 Commandments which state that, among other things, it is a blasphemy against the hallowed father to lie, steal, covet and kill. Yet, ill-gotten gains are built upon this very edifice!

I've been pondering how people who hold the 10 Cs as their supreme law can turn around to embrace reaping benefits from unscrupulous means. And then it hit me. The model for such behavior is highlighted in their own holy writ!

It's all contained in the story of King David. As the bible tells us, this David dude was a fine looking man. He became the right hand man of King Saul and was made commander of the kingdom's armies. In time, David ascends to the throne himself. So, we can easily surmise that Dav-o is a person of immense standing and stature.

One day King David was puttering around doing whatever royal people do when, all of a sudden, he saw the babe of babes. In the common vernacular, he wanted to get in her pants in the worst way possible. But there was a slight problem: the object of his lust, Bathsheba, was already married. Curses!!!

A lot of kings wouldn't have been troubled by this kind of insignificant fact; they would have simply summoned the woman and bedded her down. But King David was SUPPOSEDLY a righteous man and committing outright adultery was a big no-no. So, what to do?

Then he hatched a plan. As King, he retained the role as commander of the army. So he saw to it that Bathsheba's husband was killed in battle. With the unfortunate bloke now out of the picture, he could marry the object of his lust and get to know her in the most carnal of ways (if you catch my drift).

He was damn pleased that his subterfuge had worked out so brilliantly. Now he could Leave It to Beaver to cheer him up whenever he felt down or bored. Things seemed smashingly good until he learned that God was displeased at David's breaking of the four aforementioned commandments. David immediately begged for forgiveness and got off with a slap on the wrist (the couple's first child died).

However, here's the kicker: He still got to keep his trophy wife, the ill-gotten gain. Not only that, but it is supposedly HIS bloodline that leads to the man-god, Jesus. So, it seems to me that he ended up reaping quite a few benefits from his little escapade and, eventually, became a very celebrated figure in Jewish & Christian lore.

Now I realize that the apologists will argue that poor David repented of his initial sin and this means that God let him off virtually scot-free. The problem with this line of argument is that each time he engaged in his carnal lusts with this woman he was repeating the original sin -- the lusting for the bodily possession of a woman he could neither legally nor morally possess. Of course, maybe the way this works is that he beds her down each night and then repents every morning?

If the god of the Judeo-Christian tradition truly was a just being, the ill-gotten gain -- Bathsheba -- would have been taken away from David. Instead, he got to reap the benefit of the utter enjoyment of her company for the rest of his long life.

So, for me, this goes a long way toward explaining why so many Jews and Christians aren't bothered in the least about the rewards of ill-gotten gains. If David can reap the benefits, why not any other believer? (Needless to say, this dictum does NOT apply to non-believers. If we happen to receive an ill-gotten gain, then our eyes should be plucked out and we should be thrown into the fiery furnace for ever and ever. Amen.)