Friday, July 10, 2009

And Down the Chimney He Came

Continuing on from the preceding post, in my mind's eye, believing in Jesus, in specific, and religion, in general, is not that much unlike believing in Santa Claus. When I was 4, 5, 6, 7 and even 8 years old, Santa Claus was real and nothing anyone told me would convince me otherwise. To be certain, as I progressed in years, many of the neighborhood kids -- generally those older than me -- went to great lengths to inform me that Santa Clause didn't exist, but their words fell on deaf ears time and again.

(I want to pause here for a moment because I realize that believers in the Christian tradition may feel highly insulted that I would dare compare belief in 'ol St. Nick with the belief in the "savior of the world". I just want to say that one shouldn't focus so much on the personalities involved. I'm utilizing Santa Claus as my model solely because, here in the west, his story is so universal and almost everyone of us believed in him at some point in our lives.)

I was one of Santa Claus's greatest devotees. This story appealed to me on so many levels. Like most children, the Christmas present angle was very important, but my love for this man involved so much more than that. It wasn't that he gave presents to children all over the world; it was more that he knew about children the world over and he loved each of them equally. He was kind to animals and this has always been an important quality to me.

Yet, as much as I knew in my heart of hearts the story of the jolly elf was true, a teeny shred of doubt crept in as I grew in body and mind. At first, I refused to listen to my inner voice. I simply could not entertain the thought that Santa Claus was made-up. I had invested so many of my hopes and dreams in the truth of this story that I couldn't bear the thought that my devotion was built upon a fraud.

But sometime around the age of 8, the nagging questions kept stabbing me in the eye. How could Santa Claus appear in so many places at the same time? How could he deliver presents the world over in less than a night's work? How could someone as fat as he honestly slide down a chimney? How is it that only HIS reindeer can fly?

Little by little I came to the realization that the character of Santa Claus was rationally impossible. Simply put, there were too many holes in the story. There were too many things that didn't add up. It was a very gradual process, but one day I ceased to believe in Santa Claus.

As I moved from childhood to adulthood, it began to dawn on me that what the Santa Claus story was to children was nearly the same story of Christianity to adults. In both cases, we have this personage who can watch and keep tabs on everybody in the world simultaneously. This person rewards those who are good and punishes those who are bad. And all either of these great visages require is that you acknowledge and believe in them with all your heart.

Just like when I was a wee lad, the process of realizing that my devotion was based on myth was gradual. At first, I beat myself up for questioning God. I buried myself in the Bible and prayed to be rid of doubt. But, just as before, the irrationality of the whole ethos kept stabbing me in the eye. At some point, I just accepted that this was another fairy tale.

None of the other naysayers influenced me that much. When they would mount their arguments that Santa or God didn't exist, it caused me to clap my hands over my ears and dig in my heels. The notions that convinced them of the non-reality of the situation only convinced me more of the truth of these stories because I was still wearing my blinders. Since these stories were bound up in my own self-identity, I could not allow the contradictions to take root.

Eventually, in my own time at my own pace, the contradictions did take root and, once the roots were set, the flower of non-belief could not be stopped. It has continued to bloom and blossom to the point that there is no going back.

And this is why the church itself and its devotees fight so hard for their beliefs. They realize that once the root of doubt is manifest, it will grow unabated. So, they muster everything possible to dissuade others from providing the fertile soil for the seed and root to take hold.

7 comments:

  1. I am 100% behind the Santa as Jesus theory. The crisis in faith that occurs when a child finds out that Santa isn't Real throws everything adults say, particularly surrounding Christ and Christmas, into question.

    That's why I told my kid that Santa was as real as ET. We love ET

    Great post
    Trish

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  2. This makes a lot of sense, Comrade RT. As Marx explained, of course, there is a very good reason that religion arose. As long as there continues to be exploitation in terms of the material conditions of life, religion will continue to thrive. The way to extirpate religion is not through debate, nor through attacking religion head-on, but by changing the material conditions of life.

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  3. Hello RT, many years ago, when I was in my twenties, I went to the Christian Church to find some answers. My marriage was a mess and I needed help. From almost the very first I couldn't understand what they were telling me. I asked so many questions that the Sunday school teacher got quite irritated and breathed deeply a lot. Then I decided to read the Bible for myself. This only made me more confused. It was in the 80's and so I continued my search on tv. They were more positive, but not much clearer. I wanted to know. Now, after 33 years of trial and error I know that Jesus was just a man, an extraordinary man. Maybe a composite of many who lived and taught at that time. And I have a completely different view of myself and life and everything.

    I used to be angry with the church for the answers they gave that young woman who went for help.

    But now I know they were part of my path. I always say I am a traveler, and not a camper. What I mean by that is I go through the ideas of others and take what I like and keep going. I like to think for myself. I'm kind of stubborn that way. I think it keeps me on my own path.

    Thanks for the opportunity to share. I haven't thought much about this in some time.

    Much love to you, Anne

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  4. Trish,
    Your child will grow up more enlightened that most! Myths and stories can be very powerful vehicles and speak to us in numerous ways, but it's important to know them for what they are.

    Louie,
    While Marx didn't get everything right, it's amazing to me how often he did see things they way they are. So, I certainly agree with Marx (and you) that the real change will come via "changing the material conditions of life".

    Anne,
    I love your use of imagery, particular the idea of being a traveler, not a camper. I think that captures the spirit of the perspective I think you & I share. Thanks for those words of wisdom!!

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  5. I agree... of course, growing up in a VERY Christian household, we didn't ever believe in Santa Clause as kids. Christmas was about JESUS, nothing else. ;) So I never really cared very much for ol' St. Nick.

    But what you said is very much true, at least for me. I didn't leave the Christian religion because of anything anyone else said. I left it because I examined the religion too closely, and found only questions that had no answers, and those who try to answer my questions did not give me real answers, only rationalizations.

    BTW, I'm new to reading your blog. Hi! :)

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  6. Iktomi,
    You make a key point. I forgot that, often in the most conservative Christian homes, there is no room for Santa. The baby Jesus has such a wide berth!

    Hi back at ya. :)

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  7. In our home, for many years, Santa, and even Christmas itself (pagan in origin) was off limits. No tree. No Lights. No nothing. We spent every Christmas Day for a few years serving meals at a rescue mission. Not a bad thing to do but my reasoning was wrong.

    We are now quite pagan in our Christmas worship. And Christmas has become fun again.

    God and Santa are indeed similar, except Santa gives you coal if you are bad whereas Jesus, because of grace, gives you good things.

    That's the theory any how. :)

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