Staring Reality in the Face

Trey Smith

As mentioned in my last post, Della's dismissal from her main job has caused the two of us to face up to some things that, to be frank, we have tried to avoid thinking about.

The first of these things is that Della's work as an in-home caregiver is too hard on her own body and mind. This point really has been brought home to me over the past two weeks. During this time, she has complained a lot less about her various nagging aches and pains. Except for the times she gets down on herself for being fired, her overall mood has been far more positive. Not only have I noticed this change, but she has too.

This realization has placed us in a strange situation. In order to keep our financial heads above water, Della needs to get more caregiver hours (there aren't any other jobs in this area that come with the good health insurance she receives from her union for being a caregiver), but the more caregiver hours she garners means that her general health -- both physical and mental -- will be more compromised. It becomes a "robbing Peter to pay Paul" situation.

From our perspective, we'd like to see Della get to the 125 - 135 hour per month range. She earns $10.33/hour, so that would equate to roughly $1290 - $1390. Couple that amount with my monthly disability check and we could keep our house and eke out a meager existence. Well, that is UNTIL some sort of emergency arose (e.g., major car repair, serious illness, refrigerator gives out, etc.). Our meager budget would preclude having the financial wherewithal to deal with almost ANY kind of non-budgeted expense.

And let's be honest here. Unexpected expenses are part of life. Yes, we may luck out and not face any for a few months or years, but sooner or later, they WILL crop up. When this happens, what in the heck could we do? The answer is: Not much!!

Imagine if our car went on the fritz. Let's say we took it to the local repair shop and they gave us an estimate of $500. I can tell you right now that we won't have $500 sitting around gathering dust. Della's job mandates that she has to have reliable transportation and, if el carro no worko, then Della no worko either. If Della no worko, then we shortly won't be able to keep the lights on, the toilets flushing OR our mortgage paid.

Looking at our situation, we've come to realize that our time as homeowners needs to come to an end. We've somehow managed to get this far, but our dwindling financial resources in conjunction with Della's health issues necessitates that we need to stare reality in the face and not blink. We need to downsize in a major (and painful) way.

I will need to give up on my home gardening project. I need to let go of my desire to live in a two-story and multi-bedroom house. We will most likely never have a wood-burning fireplace again. Worst of all, we eventually will need to surrender most of or all of our cherished animal buddies.

This process won't be easy, but it is needed.