The Money Trap

While religion, nationalism, ethnicity and history play key roles in any armed conflict, the one variable that often receives a short shrift is the economic angle. Simply put, war is good for business. While there is no question that many in the population and certain industries suffer, other individuals and industries profit mightily from ongoing military endeavors.

Too often, I fear, those individuals and industries profiting from the war apparatus aren't genuinely interested in the cessation of armed conflict. To be sure, they are more than willing to mouth words like "justice" and "peace", but under the surface, they do everything possible not to bring such things to fruition.

Several years ago, when the Brits and Northern Ireland were at each others throats, it seemed that every time peace appeared possible, one side would do something to provoke the other and, whatever possibility for peace that existed, quickly evaporated.

I was thinking about this general topic in relation to the current slaughter in Gaza. Israel, behaving like a big bully, is allowed to commit these heinous acts because of the money trail. I've read various estimates of $3 - $5 billion per year that Israel receives each year from the good 'ol US of A.

If we had a US administration with any backbone, they would tell Israel that, if they keep repressing and beating up on their neighbors, that the flow of cash would cease altogether or that for every military incursion x amount of dollars would be subtracted from the overall aid package.

Since the Israeli army is propped up by US funds, this would provide the Israeli government with a clear reason of economic self-interest to dash to the peace table post haste.

Of course, one of the chief reasons our elected officials don't have this kind of a backbone is because of their own issue of economic self-interest. The Democrats, particularly, rely on massive amounts of campaign contributions from wealthy American Jews and Jewish organizations. Consequently, to keep the money flowing into their coffers, they must keep American tax dollars flowing into the Israeli coffer.

If we could somehow remove the financial variable from the equation, then I think we would have a far more peaceful world.

When We Die

Though I've been writing on this topic a bit lately, in all honesty, I don't spend a lot of time thinking or visualizing what I think the human death experience is like once the last breath is taken. For me, since I don't believe that ANY of us even can begin to conceptualize this process until it actually happens, it seems like a royal waste of time and, since our time in this realm is short, it would seem far more productive to think about other things.

That said, like most people, the thought does cross my mind from time to time. So, understanding the limitations of words, here's a loose description of how I envision what I already know I can't truly envision.

For me, there is no individualized soul beyond this life. When I'm certified dead as a doornail, the part of me that's non-physical will gravitate toward a bright light. Initially, my conscious will understand the distinction between itself and the light. However, as I move closer, it will envelope me and I will cease to be a distinct and individual entity. I will become one with whatever it is.

For the purposes of visualization, I can reference one film and one TV show. In the film, Field of Dreams, James Earl Jones' character walks into the cornfield only to melt away. Another way to describe this experience is to think about the transporter room in the show, Star Trek. It will be like beaming up or down with the only difference being that my individual essence isn't reconstituted at the destination.

Of course, it's probably nothing like I envision or have described here. It just is what it is.

If you think about such thoughts, what do you envision it to be?

So Blissfully Blissful

For most humans, death is a difficult concept to grasp completely. We understand that it means removal from our worldly dimension, but, beyond that, it's anybody's guess. While adults understand the affects of death somewhat better, for children it's a real conundrum. Why is this person (or animal) gone and when will they be back?

Religions try to comfort us all with visions of a heavenly destination, a place where the soul goes to live out a blissful existence free from the stress of worldly life.

I remember being told such things as a child. In Sunday School, we had books with beautiful pictures of the kindly God -- a grandfatherly sort -- welcoming loved ones into the pearly gates high in the sky beyond the clouds. It was an idyllic image and, for a brief time when I was very young, made me feel a lot better about death and its consequences.

Maybe I would have stayed in the fold a little longer IF they hadn't fused this picture with another one. Since the various authorities (church, school, parents, etc.) wished to create perfect little beings, we were constantly warned against impure thoughts. Such thoughts, I was told, were as heinous as impure actions.

To drive home this point, I was told numerous times that my dead loved ones were watching me from heaven. If an impure thought just happened to pop into me little noggin, they would see it and I certainly wouldn't want to embarrass myself in that way. So, I needed to be on my best behavior at ALL times -- even in the deep recesses of my mind.

But these two images -- a blissful existence in heaven versus celestial peeping toms -- contradict each other and I recognized this, even as a 7 or 8 year old. How can souls look down on the world below and remain blissful?

Put another way, how could a spiritual being watch incessant human misery, angst and suffering, yet not be affected in the least? "Oh Marge, look. There's a group of people being slaughtered by an army. Would you like more tea and crumpets?"

Even if you don't subscribe to the imagery of spiritual voyeurism, how could any soul be at rest knowing the trials and tribulations of their former residence?

Finally, how could any soul be blissful if there wasn't stress to counter it? We only know what things are by understanding their antithesis. If "heaven" is a place free of all stress, then me thinks it would be very, very boring. Under such conditions, blissfulness would be the same as nothingness.

And nothingness -- in the Christian sense -- doesn't sound like a lot to look forward to.

A Superb Article on Gaza

If you're interested in learning what the mainstream media doesn't tell you about the conflict in Gaza, I invite you to visit my other blog, Greener Times, to read Maryrose Asher's excellent article, "Countering US-Israel Propaganda Regarding Gaza". The introduction is shown below.

Before I begin, I would like to give you some personal background.

I first went to Israel in the fall of 1986 just before the first Intifada. My husband worked at the time as the Associate Endowment Director for the Jewish Community Federation of San Francisco and we were invited to go on a mission with one of the groups. Newly married, and having converted to Judaism so we could be married by my husband’s father who was the rabbi of the largest reform congregation in San Francisco, I went with the usual expectations of any average American.

My ignorance regarding Israel was lost during that trip. I saw the racism, the apartheid, and the mistreatment of the Palestinians. As part of the trip we went to Hebron where I heard racist comments from the mouth of a Jewish settler that matched any I heard in the south while vacationing with my grandmother in the late 1950s. We also visited an Arab school in East Jerusalem where the libraries were empty and the classrooms dismal. I secretly exchanged addresses with two of the Palestinian teachers and had to lie at the airport when Israeli security asked me if I had taken any contact names home with me. If you have ever gone through Israeli security, you know how intimidating the experience was.

We came back and started working with New Jewish Agenda. I was elected Northwest Regional Representative, representing chapters in California, Oregon, and Washington (although the active chapters were primarily in California). Living closest to Stanford University and University of California - Berkeley, our members voted for cutting aid to Israel. Quarterly, I had to travel to New York to meet with the national folks and did my best to argue for the national organization to take this position. As expected, our chapters were viewed as too radical. The decision eventually split the organization and New Jewish Agenda folded soon after we moved to Seattle in 1990. Jewish Voice for Peace headquartered in San Francisco now has many of the same members but is continuing to have the same internal debates.

Now that you know a little about me, I hope you will understand if what I write shows a little less patience, and balance, when writing about US-Israel propaganda. The mainstream media and mainstream Jewish organizations provide you with enough information regarding Israel’s position so I will try to really provide “balance.”

I feel this is important for me to try to do. Joe Mowrey, a Palestinian rights and human rights activist living in Santa Fe, New Mexico, wrote, “I am finding that even many very antiwar progressives are being lured into a belief that what Israel is doing is a surgical strike against militants in Gaza...”

Rolling Snake Eyes on Health Care

I found a really great article at a site called SmartAboutHealth.net. It illustrates one of the many ways our health care system is failing most Americans.

Families USA released a new report which has revealed that for many unemployed Americans, COBRA health insurance is simply too expensive.

Families USA, the non-profit group, put out the report this week, focusing on COBRA, the Consolidated Omnibus Budget Reconciliation Act of 1985.

The goal behind COBRA was to make health insurance affordable for unemployed Americans.

Families USA has found though that this is not the case, as they compared the average monthly premium for family health insurance under COBRA to how much compensation an average unemployed American received.

They found that the average compensation is around $1,300 for an unemployed American, while the average monthly premiums for family health insurance coverage under COBRA is $1,000.

This leaves next to nothing for families to live off of, making COBRA simply too expensive.

Overall, only 25% of those who are actually eligible for COBRA sign up for it, mainly due to the high cost.

With 47 million Americans living without health insurance, this is not a positive sign.

My wife & I can certainly vouch for this conclusion. Several years ago, when my wife was between jobs, she was offered the standard COBRA coverage. The amount listed for the premium was unreal! We could only afford to pay one month's premium and then my wife was left with 3 months of no health coverage whatsoever.

Some protection!!

More Than One-Sided

I'm going to return to the story about the little girl returned to her grandparents cited below (in chronological order, that is). If you will notice from the various reports, only ONE SIDE of the story is being told -- the grandparent's side. There are no interviews with the caseworkers involved and we know next to nothing about their reasoning and rationale for their actions.

You want to know why the caseworkers are silent? Confidentiality! State regulations and the ethics of any dedicated social worker prevent them from answering questions or shedding any light on the situation. They are simply not allowed to give "their side" of the story.

Of course, the media knows this, but you'd never guess it from their reports. They make it look like they've covered every angle and they are providing you -- the viewer -- with their objective take on the entirety of the topic. But it's next too impossible to present an objective report when all the information the reporter is getting is one-sided.

Imagine if you were involved in a disagreement with your partner/spouse, child, neighbor or coworker. You turn on the evening news and the story of your disagreement is splashed across the screen. The reporter is telling the world what a horrible human being you are! You were never interviewed for the story, so all the information about the situation comes from the person you have the disagreement with and even a few of their cohorts are talking about disagreements they've had with you too.

Would you think you had been treated fairly? (I'm guessing that most people would think not.)

Lessen the Yoke

Why are the people starving?
Because the rulers eat up the money in taxes.
Therefore the people are starving.
~ Tao Te Ching, a portion of Seventy-Five ~

I can immediately hear the anti-tax forces in this country saying, "See, even Taoists don't believe in taxes!" This illustrates one of the problems with reading things with contemporary eyes and assuming the conditions of today are the same as when the author wrote these words.

Lao Tzu (or whoever actually wrote it) lived thousands of years ago when the feudal economic system was the status quo. Had this verse been written today, I think it would have addressed the issues in a somewhat different manner.

People are indeed starving today. Many live without adequate health care. During the current economic crisis, many ordinary folks are losing their jobs, homes and life savings. Of course, the rich seem to get keep getting richer, in part, because ordinary taxpayers are bailing them out with billions and billions of our tax dollars.

So, if Lao Tzu penned this verse today, I believe he would point out that the vast majority are not seeing an adequate return on their tax dollars. While average Joes and Janes pay their money into the sytem, it is too often not being spent in ways that benefits the body politic.

Our infastructure is crumbling beneath our feet. Schools and work programs are underfunded. Mental health services are a joke for the same reason. Environmental safeguards -- those rules put in place to protect public health -- are shelved, ignored and/or watered down. While we waste trillions of dollars on wars of aggression, we simultaneously short needed social programs and we don't even adequately treat the medical and mental health issues for those soldiers who have returned home from those wars!

In many ways, it's almost like we've returned to the feudal system. The vast majority of Americans are serfs. We are mandated to give a portion of our wages to our lord (government) who turns around and lavishes it on the barons of finance and industry (corporations) and uses another large portion to fund his many conquests (war).

Objects May Appear Larger Than Normal

On the news tonight on King 5 was a story about a 3 year old child being reunited with her grandparents. Reporter Susannah Frame got choked up in the studio talking about the story.

Investigators: Judge gives girl back to grandparents

After a two-year battle, an Enumclaw couple has been reunited with their granddaughter. A judge ruled the child is leaving foster care to be with family...It's a stunning turn of events in a bitter custody case that the KING 5 investigators have been following for months.

Of course, the reversal in recommendation by the state's social service agency is being hailed as making up for a grievous mistake. However, as a former child abuse investigator both in Arkansas and Missouri, I can tell you firsthand that we really don't know if the mistake is the initial recommendation or this later one.

We live in a very mixed up society with people split down the middle on the subject of child abuse. About one-half the people always view this subject solely through the lens of parents/relatives and they believe that the state too easily removes children. The other half views this subject in the opposite way. Social service agencies are too slow to remove children from abusive families.

Consequently, whatever social services does, they know going in they will be severely criticized by at least one camp and, in some situations, by both at the same time!

I don't know anything specific about the case in the report. It could very well have been bungled by social services and the situation has now been rectified. On the other hand, the original recommendation -- that the child be placed in foster care -- may have been in the best interest of the child and the only reason social services has flip-flopped is due to the negative publicity coming immediately prior to the beginning of the new legislative session.

What I do know is that the news media tends to take one side or the other in these cases. The media tends to simplify very complex situations and it is presented to the public in black and white terms when everything, in reality, is various shades of gray. It is for this reason alone that I assume King 5 has not been very objective in the report of this ongoing situation.

Tao of Humility

I grew up in a middle class home. My mother was a Licensed Social Worker and my father was a civil attorney, then a municipal court judge and then a criminal defense attorney. It was expected that my brother and I would go to college -- Both of us did and we have 4 college degrees between the two of us.

After I finished college, I settled down and got married. Though I've never been rich, we earned enough for several years to continue in the middle class. Even when our financial situation started to nosedive, Della & I have always had enough to get by and to donate to others. Over the years, we've both volunteered lots of time and donated oodles of nonperishables to local food banks to help those less fortunate.

Today, for the first time in my 50+ years, I went to a local food bank, not as a volunteer or to make a donation, but as a recipient. I was vaguely uncomfortable.

It's the same sort of feeling I had the first time I received Food Stamps. I was in grad school and my meager pay as a Graduate Teaching Assistant simply wasn't enough to get by on. I remember going to the local grocery store very early in the day in the hopes I wouldn't see any of my classmates. I was also very self-conscious about what I selected because I didn't want anyone to think I was using my food allotment on junk.

Back then, it was a lot worse than it is now. Food Stamps looked a lot like Monopoly money. As soon as you handed over the fake cash, everyone in your line KNEW you were one of the po' folk living off of government handouts. Today, I don't have to flash the funny money; we're given a ATM-like card.

So, I've seen and lived on both sides of the aisle. I liked it better when I was the making the donations, not the one receiving them. But my life is what it is and I have to learn to accept it...humbly.

Global Warming, Maybe?

We've lived in South Bend for a little less than 1 1/2 years. Before that, we lived about the same amount of time just north of here in Aberdeen. During our relatively brief time on the southwest Washington coast, we've encounter 4 -- count 'em 4 -- historic weather events! For all those who think global warming is nothing more than liberal claptrap, I suggest you move to my region. After living here a year or two, I'm confident you'll sing a far different tune.

During our first year in Aberdeen (Spring 2006), we had street flooding that locals told me was far greater than anyone could ever remember. Franklin Park -- just down the street from our rented house -- is a sunken park used for rain catchment in the rainy season, October - March. While there had been several occasions in which the park almost filled up completely, no one could remember a time when it had overflowed into the surrounding neighborhood. And that's what it did!

Since moving to South Bend in August 2007, we've experienced the greatest wind storm on record (December 2007 -- gusts to 150 mph), the greatest snowfall on record (December 2008 -- nearly 18" over several days) and the greatest one day rainfall record (today -- currently at 10.13" and still climbing).

If these various weather events occurred over a 10 or 20 year period, then I might agree that each represents the typical ebb and flow of climatic patterns in this region. But they have each happened within less than 2 years. What are the odds of that?

Me thinks the odds are infinitesimally small, if not for GLOBAL WARMING. Unfortunately, it's beginning to look like these sorts of weather events are becoming the norm, not the exception.

Who knows? The way things are going the next weather event on our calendar may be a major tornado (we almost NEVER have tornadoes here) or a tsunami!!!

Sir, Your Ark Is Double-Parked

As I've reported to you in the past, it rains a lot on the Southwest Washington Coast. On average, we receive about 37.5" of precipitation during the months of November, December and January. Therefore, rain typically is not regarded as a weather event in this part of the country.

That said, the rain is becoming such an event now. In the past 34 hours, we've recorded nearly 9" in the rain gauge. In fact, South Bend normally receives 12.05" for the entire month of January; we've received 1.25" MORE than that amount in LESS than 7 days. Today alone -- only 10 hours old -- we've received nearly 5.20". And the worst of this storm isn't supposed to arrive until late this afternoon!!!

If the next storm materializes as forecast, it is conceivable that we will record between 10 - 12" in one 24-hour period. That's really mind-boggling, even for here!

Our chief river, the Willapa, rarely floods. Generally, most of our flooding is the result of a combination of high tide and storm surge. But the Willapa is flooding now due to the biblical amounts of rain. It will certainly get worse before it gets better.

If all that wasn't enough, the forecast this afternoon calls for the possibility of hurricane force winds. It's been very blustery already over the past 24 hours. So, it's very likely that the north Pacific County area may be cut off from the outside world for a day or two due to flooded highways and numerous mudslides.

I'll keep you posted...provided our electricity doesn't get knocked out.

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Update #1 @ 3:15 p.m.

After a bit of a "lull", the rain again is coming down in torrents. As of right now, we've had 6.87" of rain since midnight which means 15.00" total for the first 7 days of the new year.

It is predicted the Willapa River will crest at 26' -- 5 feet above flood stage -- sometime in the wee hours of the morning. The highest crest ever recorded has been 27.4'. If the rain continues to come down as much as expected, I won't be surprised in the least if we exceed that record.

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Update #2 @ 7:30 p.m.

It's raining. It's pouring. It's blowing. Will it ever let up? With 4 1/2 hours left to go in this calendar day, the rain gauge now stands at 9.20" and a 48-hour total of 12.79" -- more than a foot of rain!

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Update #3 @ 9:40 p.m.

Ten freaking inches. That's where we stand with a little over 2 hours to go in this day. While the winds have picked up, the rain itself has actually slackened a wee bit. I'll post one more update just after midnight with the final day's total.

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Update #4 @ 11:59 p.m.

Today's total = 10.93"
Two day total = 14.52"
Month to date = 19.06" (7.01" above normal with 24 days to go!)

My Little Friend

I've spent quite a little space here discussing our dog Scruffy's untimely death, but, before I put the topic to bed, I realized I should write a few words about how she came to be a part of our family and what she was like when alive!

My wife & I were working as volunteers at an animal rescue organization -- PAWS -- in Aberdeen. One day a women brought in a dirty little dog. She said that they had a new dog and didn't need this one anymore -- talk about a callous perspective! She signed the necessary form, then lit out the door. She didn't even bother to say goodbye!

The little dog (who looked sort of like Benji -- a mutt with some Cairn Terrier in her) was placed in a carrier in the front office. She was trembling terribly as it was obvious that she was terrified beyond belief. When I took a break from cleaning out cages, I came out into the office to visit the frightened pooch. I let her out of the carrier and took her with me into one of the back rooms.

It took a little bit of coaxing, but I could tell that she was eager for some attention and affection. I immediately took to her as she seemed to have a serene personality and my wife agreed.

As it was coming to the end of the day, one of the other volunteers started loading up the dogs in the PAWS van to take them to Central Park -- while the cats stayed on site, there wasn't enough room to house the dogs. Most of the dogs were big and several were very rambunctious. I was worried that little Scruffy might have a coronary on the 15 minute ride, so I asked if we could take her home with us overnight. The director said that was okay.

My wife was a bit nervous about this arrangement because she KNOWS that I have a tendency to become very attached to things and beings quickly. Of course, she had a bona fide reason to be concerned!! Once Scruffy came home with us, she never left. :-) Though, in the end, my wife agreed readily that she should stay.

Because of past abuse and/or neglect, Scruffy was starved for love and stability. Since I was the first person to offer this, I became her God! From day one, she followed me wherever I went.

She loved to go on car rides with one caveat. I had to go too. There were many times when only Della was going someplace and Scruffy would refuse to get in the car if I wasn't getting in too. If I happened to go someplace and she wasn't invited to go (which was very infrequent), she let me know of her disappointment the moment I stepped foot in the house! She would sing a song of woe to me and gently nip at my hands.

In fact, she was an accomplished singer. She would sing when she was excited or happy and, sometimes, for no apparent reason at all.

When I was in a lot of pain from my fibromyalgia -- a frequent occurrence -- she was always there to try to cheer me up. She loved to sit on my lap in my living room chair, sit at (or on!) my feet in my computer room or find her favorite spot next to my sleeping mat (note: I don't sleep in a bed).

While I had to walk our other two dogs on their leashes, Scruffy rarely wore a leash. She didn't need one as she stayed very close and, if she strayed a bit, all I had to do was call her name softly and she was right back on my heel.

All in all, she was the most well-behaved dog I've ever had as a member of my family. I think I had to scold her only twice in 2 1/2 years. I've written here before that I spend a great deal of my time alone -- a common AS characteristic -- but, with her passing, I realize that statement wasn't entirely true. No, I spend a great deal of my time without direct human contact, but not alone because Scruffy was usually with me.

Now that she's gone, I am indeed spending a lot of my time alone. Maybe that's why I miss her so much right now.

Lay Me Down Softly

As I watched my little pooch fall asleep and die, I thought to myself, "Now that's the way I'd like to go." Seriously. If one day I am suffering from a terminal disease and wracked by immense pain, what a blessing it would be simply to fall asleep and then drift away.

While most people favor euthanasia for animals, a lot of them come absolutely unglued when others suggest this methodology be used by humans with terminal illness. Conservative Christians as well as the Catholic Church fought strenuously against the Death with Dignity ballot initiatives in Oregon and Washington, though both still passed by large majorities.

While the religious opponents of Death with Dignity trot out a slew of objections, it just struck me that one of these contradicts one of their own core beliefs -- miracles.

In both Oregon & Washington, I remember seeing print and TV ads which played upon the "miracles" theme. According to this line of reasoning, miraculous cures come about every day. People who are diagnosed with terminal illnesses sometimes defy the odds to live long lives free of the disease that was supposed to kill them post haste. Consequently, terminally ill patients shouldn't be allowed to kill themselves because then there will be no chance for a miracle cure.

To this I say, why not?

According to the bible, Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. So, couldn't "God" raise Aunt Martha or cousin Bruce from the dead? I mean, if you want to talk about a miracle, wouldn't that be doggone dramatic?

God could work his miracle as the ill person tried to kill themselves. There they'd be taking the medicinal cocktail to end their life and yet they wouldn't die. The doctors would be called in and they would simply scratch their heads to say, "We can't explain what happened here."

On the other hand, the person could die as scheduled. The body would be taken to the morgue or funeral home. At this juncture, God could cure them both of death and the disease. Wouldn't that make for a most interesting phone call? "Honey, would you come pick me up at the morgue? I really do want to get out of these clothes and, maybe, go to dinner."

If you believe that your God is omnipotent, then why confine the miraculous to certain parameters? It seems to me that those very parameters contradict the genuineness of the belief itself.

Straw Dogs

Heaven and earth are impartial;
They see the ten thousand things as straw dogs.
The wise are impartial;
They see the people as straw dogs.
~ Tao Te Ching, a portion of Five ~

For me, these 4 lines typify one of the prime differences between monotheistic religion and Taoism. Under the former, there is this belief that the supreme being personalizes everything and is orchestrating the world for its own purposes. For the Taoist, there is no personalization whatsoever -- things occur due to cause and effect.

I must admit that I've never understood why so many people find comfort in the belief that their God has taken a loved one for divine reasons. A baby dies and we so often hear friends and family exclaim, "God had a reason for taking him/her from us. We don't know what that reason is, but we must have faith that it's for a good reason."

Since some babies die and some babies live, it makes one's God seem rather capricious! What's he doing up there? Rolling dice or utilizing a celestial dartboard to decide who lives and who dies? Besides, what could this ulterior purpose be? Since God is supposedly omnipotent, he doesn't need any helpers as his world is perfect.

When I hear of or experience (second or third person) a tragic death -- be it a baby, an adult, a group of people or even my own dog -- I understand that there was obviously a cause and effect that led to this outcome. I realize that, because of an infinite number of variables, I most likely will be incapable of isolating all of these variables to be able to see the precise progression of circumstance that led to the result, but this progression exists nonetheless.

Because I don't believe in a personified being, I don't have the need to look to the heavens to ask, "Why God? Why?" I understand that it's nothing personal. I understand that all of the ten thousand things eventually die -- some sooner and some later.

One of the Greatest Gifts

If you ask most people, one of the greatest gifts is the gift of life. However, death too can fall into this category. When suffering becomes so great that it removes one's verve for life, being able to let go and send someone home is a gift beyond compare.

I write this about 1 1/2 hours after we had our dear little Scruffy euthanized. It's never easy saying goodbye to a member of the immediate family -- human or otherwise -- even when you know in your heart that it's for the best. The pain begins almost immediately as a being you valued is no more.

As with most all of our animals friends, I was there in the final moments. My wife couldn't bear the thought (not so soon after losing Becca this past summer), so she sat in the car with our remaining dog. In all truth, I actually didn't want to be there for myself, but since Scruffy has been MY dog, first and foremost, I knew I had to put my grief aside and be there for her.

Even though I've experienced this event several times over the past four decades, it doesn't get any easier. In a manner of speaking, it's kind of surreal. You're standing there talking to the veterinarian like you have many times before -- ours is a very, very gentle man -- while he shaves a portion of one of the dog's forelegs. In the next instant, he says, "Are you ready?" and then, when you are, he inserts the needle into the dog's leg. As you watch the plunger slowly inject the liquid, your dog calmly lays down her head and that's it. Within a few mere seconds, your friend and family member is dead.

At times like these, I almost wish I believed in heaven! If I did, then I could look forward to the time that I could be reunited with all my pets and lost loved ones. But alas, I don't believe in heaven, so I soothe myself with the thought that Scruffy is no longer suffering and that she is now one with Tao.

Now, I'm going to go have a good, long cry.

One Rough Year

Back in July, my wife and I had to make the agonizing decision to have our beloved Becca euthanized. Tomorrow we're going to have to go down that same road again as our dear Scruffy will be put to sleep. That will leave us with one dog -- Heidi, the eldest of the three at nearly 15 years old. She's not doing that well either and I'll be surprised if she makes to the end of 2009.

Scruffy has cancer. Though we don't have much money, we bottomed out our savings account in August so Scruffy could have two tumors removed. Of course, our hope was that we could nip the disease in the bud and Scruffy could enjoy many more years of life. Unfortunately, as with we humans, we only bought a few months as the cancer returned and has spread quickly.

Our little doggie can no longer use her right front leg. She hobbles around on three and yelps anytime her damaged leg is bumped or when she tries to readjust her position when laying down. Even worse, a massive tumor has sprung out of nowhere and is impacting her near her left hind leg.

So, the humane thing to do at this point is to alleviate her misery. Needless to say, it will be a sorrowful day in our household tomorrow. I will be losing my little buddy -- Scruffy goes everywhere I go -- and poor Heidi is going to feel lost now that both of her canine comrades are gone.

But in order to truly understand the beauty and value of life, we must each confront death and we will have a conversation with the Grim Reaper tomorrow afternoon.

Tightening the Noose

The Wall Street Journal reports that the banking industry has grown a bit smaller as three behemoths bought out three of their rivals.

Bank of America Corp., Wells Fargo & Co. and PNC Financial Services Group Inc. completed acquisitions of three rivals this week as the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression continues to roil and reshape the U.S. banking industry.

All three acquirers are expected to cut jobs as they digest their pickups.

As I understand it, proponents of our capitalist system say that the reason this economic system works so well is because of competition. With competing companies, they say, the consumer can best pick and choose which services each desires and also get the best bang for their buck.

It might sound like a plausible system to some, except for one tiny bug in the ointment -- these days the idea of competition is, more and more often, falling to the wayside. As each industry shrinks, consumers keep coming out on the short end of the stick.

Why, you ask? Because the great behemoths control more and more of the market and they get to dictate such things as supply and prices.

It's getting to the point in which I tremble each time I check the newspaper or an online news source. At the rate we're going, we may wake up one day to find that there is one bank or one office supply chain or one restaurant chain or one...

Lest We Forget

When men lack a sense of awe, there will be disaster.
~ Tao Te Ching, a portion of Seventy-Two ~

For me, this sentence cuts to the heart of humankind's willful arrogance. We too often get so full of ourselves that we begin to think we are each masters of our own universe. Nothing can stop us.

When we lose our sense of awe and reverence for the world around us, we're in trouble! This is a lesson that we each -- as individuals and as a society -- seem to need to learn over and over again.

There are so many examples of this. Just to cite one, we have created a society that gives a short shrift to basic environmental principles. The word of the day is short-term profits over long-term viability. We have been treading this unsustainable path for generations and now we're coming to the day when we will reap the unfortunate consequences.

Life as we know it is changing right underneath our feet and overhead. The seasons are not as routine as they used to be and weather across the globe is growing more extreme. Diseases, that we pompously once thought we had eradicated, are making a comeback with deadly results. Fresh water, a substance we cannot live without, is growing more scarce. Everywhere we look, changes are going to have major impacts on current and future generations.

We stand at this precipice simply because we lost our sense of awe. The question now is: Can we get it back before it's too late?

And Away We Go

Over the next few days or weeks (or who knows?), I will discuss my understanding and insights in relation to various verses within the Tao Te Ching. I like this small volume because, each time I read it, it leads me to contemplation.

I don't read the Tao Te Ching like many religious adherents read their sacred texts. I pick up the volume only when the spirit moves me. Sometimes this is daily. More often, it's every now and then. And I don't read it expecting answers; I read it to help formulate the questions.

As I've written in this space before, I want to start off with a word of extreme caution. If you are new to the study of Taoism, do not expect to find the definitive answers here. For one thing, there are no definitive answers! Tao is something we must each find on our own in our own time. For another, I get different insights out of the verses at different times. Sometimes they are merely variations on the same theme. At other times, my insights may be altogether different.

One of the great beauties of blogging is that it's interactive -- a conversation in the virtual ether. People from all walks of life and situations can share and discuss ideas. It is my sincerest hope that in reading my posts about the various ideas of Taoism it will spur you to contemplate the Tao as well and to share YOUR insights in the comments section.

Different voices only enrich the colorful tapestry of Tao. It's not an issue of who is right versus who is wrong. No, the issue is what you glean from your experiences on your path and how this may help others as they traverse their own paths.

I should note that my perspectives are colored by the fact I have Asperger's Syndrome (AS), a high functioning form of autism. Folks with AS are neurologically-wired different than neurotypicals, so we naturally view the world around us differently. This fact alone may impact my writings here -- then again, it may not. ;-)

Finally, please make note of the long list of links to other websites and blogs that deal with Taoism (as well as the Fellow Wanderers). Each week I search the web for more links to add. While I hope your time at TRT is well spent, I encourage you to seek out other perspectives and insights.

And away we go...

Limitation Through Definition

All men will come to him who keeps to the one,
For there lie rest and happiness and peace.

Passersby may stop for music and good food,
But a description of the Tao
Seems without substance or flavor.
It cannot be seen, it cannot be heard,
And yet it cannot be exhausted.
~ Tao Te Ching, Thirty-Five ~

In most religions, the supreme one is defined. We are told that it is just, loving, jealous, angry, forgiving or receptive. However, the moment you attempt to define it, you limit it. It's like you've placed it in a neat little box of rigid construction. Too often, in your mind, it becomes fixed by the very definitions YOU ascribe to it.

Tao, on the other hand, is accepted as definition-less. Tao is not defined as this or that; Tao just is. By not defining Tao, Tao is limitless and, as stated in the Tao Te Ching, "it cannot be exhausted".