There is a story coming out of Eastern Washington that a recently arrested 17 year old high school student had been plotting a Columbine-like massacre at Chelan High School. As is too often the case in plots and actions of this sort, the youth stated that part of the reason for his plan was derived from the fact he was tired of being picked on and bullied by his peers.
When we look back over the rash of school shootings by juveniles in the last twenty years, more often than not, being picked on and pushed around is THE motivation for wanting "to get even." A majority of these kids are loners who face severe ostracizing from their classmates.
While I am certainly NOT excusing their behavior -- planned or carried out -- I do understand full well where they are coming from. As a youth, I was in the same boat. In fact, I was considered so weird by my peers that even the nerds held me at arm's length! There was no group or clique that accepted me.
Needless to say, my growing up years were very lonely. While I loved the educational aspect of school, I hated the social part. Recess, particularly, was the worst part of the day for me. When picking teams, I was never picked. Sometimes the teachers assigned me to a team, but mostly I hung out by myself in a corner of the school yard.
So, I know where many of these kids are coming from! To be painfully honest, there were times in which I imagined great harm coming to my classmates, though not necessarily at my hand. It's probably a good thing that there were no guns in our home because, had there been, who knows if I might have vented my pain and frustration in a violent manner at school! (Probably not because I've always been a pacifist, but...)
For me, I think the number one thing a parent can teach a child is not to make fun of others who are different. Children can be so cruel and, in today's world, that often sets the stage for potential carnage.
When we look back over the rash of school shootings by juveniles in the last twenty years, more often than not, being picked on and pushed around is THE motivation for wanting "to get even." A majority of these kids are loners who face severe ostracizing from their classmates.
While I am certainly NOT excusing their behavior -- planned or carried out -- I do understand full well where they are coming from. As a youth, I was in the same boat. In fact, I was considered so weird by my peers that even the nerds held me at arm's length! There was no group or clique that accepted me.
Needless to say, my growing up years were very lonely. While I loved the educational aspect of school, I hated the social part. Recess, particularly, was the worst part of the day for me. When picking teams, I was never picked. Sometimes the teachers assigned me to a team, but mostly I hung out by myself in a corner of the school yard.
So, I know where many of these kids are coming from! To be painfully honest, there were times in which I imagined great harm coming to my classmates, though not necessarily at my hand. It's probably a good thing that there were no guns in our home because, had there been, who knows if I might have vented my pain and frustration in a violent manner at school! (Probably not because I've always been a pacifist, but...)
For me, I think the number one thing a parent can teach a child is not to make fun of others who are different. Children can be so cruel and, in today's world, that often sets the stage for potential carnage.
i agree. had i not been homeschooled, i likely would have faced the same ostracism. however since my socialization came from extracurriculars, i wasn't quite as ostracised. however, i did notice that i got along better with people older than me. i rarely socialized with people my own age.
ReplyDeletehowever i had so much anger as a youth. i might have shot someone, or committed suicide, had my situation been different. it's rather scary.
I think our curriculum should include things like meditation, eastern philosophy, martial arts. The standard school social life is stacked against the outliers; some of these skills would be useful for everyone!
ReplyDeleteWelcome home, my brother. I know exactly what you mean. Had my parents kept guns, I'd likely either be in prison or the ground now.
ReplyDeleteIt's all starting to come together. "Weird" in highschool.. no friends to speak of. Better claim it's high functioning autism or people might think it's your own fault!!! How the fuck anyone ever pitied you enough to marry you is beyond my comprehension.
ReplyDeleteIktomi & Thurman,
ReplyDeleteIt seems like the three of us well understand the angst of being bullied and ostracized.
Baroness,
Your suggestions are spot on!
Anon,
Well, I see you've returned from your self-imposed sabbatical. In most cases, I'm going to ignore you simply because it's patently obvious that a) you are a very angry person, b) you like to vent anonymously on the internet and c) you aren't interested in having a conversation.
So, go ahead and spew forth with your obscenity-laced tirades. I hope it makes you feel better about yourself.
Ever thought about seeing a mental health professional?
It wasn't a self-imposed sabbatical, don't rewrite history. You disabled anonymous commenting because of me in a direct attempt to try and get me to stop coming here.
ReplyDeleteAbout seeing a mental health professional, no, why bother? I have already self-diagnosed myself as having Asperger's syndrome, which I should remind you is autism.
It's funny, you self-diagnose yourself and now you diagnose me, a complete stranger, knowing virtually nothing about me. You have never taken a basic psychology course, been to medical school, or even had contact with anyone with a true mental disorder. You're the last person in the world I'd go to for medical advice.
If I needed advice on some batshit insane mysticism, maybe I'd come to you, third fourth or fifth.
While it is indeed true that I disabled anonymous commenting -- for a total of 3 or 4 days -- you've been gone for like a month or so. Hence, the reference to a "self-imposed" sabbatical.
ReplyDeleteAs to the rest of your insipid comment, I am on disability because the federal gov't has made such a determination. It's not via a "self-diagnosis". My mental health therapist is also a separate person and has rendered his own diagnosis.
Of course, I realize that since you seem to think you're a god of some sort -- all knowing, all seeing -- that this probably isn't good enough authority for you.