Wen Tzu - Verse 67

from Verse Sixty-Seven

Virtue is in what you give, not in what you get. Therefore when sages want to be valued by others, first they value others; when they want to be respected by others, first they respect others. When they want to overcome others, first they overcome themselves; when they want to humble others, first they humble themselves.

~ Wen-tzu: Understanding the Mysteries ~

When many of us wish to change perceived negative aspects of our lives, the first place we look is outward. It's so much easier to blame our mood, situation or circumstance on others. For one thing, since we generally can't control other people's behavior or attitudes, it provides us with a ready-made excuse to gripe. My life is shit because...and we have a zillion external reasons to finish off the sentence.

Yes, bad things happen to good people, but it's how we react to negative situations or circumstances that measures a person. If we so desire, we can bitch, moan, throw a tantrum or bawl our eyes out, but, aside from releasing emotion, these acts rarely help to rectify the situation!

Often, all such acts do is to reinforce our negative feelings and lowers us into a cesspool of our own making. And other people react by excusing their own negative mood by blaming us for our toxicity.

This post is part of a series. For an introduction, go here.