In my last post, I talked about how discombobulating it is to discover you have Asperger's Syndrome (AS). Now I will discuss the other side of the coin.
In a manner of speaking, finding out you have AS is liberating! It means my weirdness is not derived solely from selfishness, arrogance or stubbornness. It means there is a neurological explanation for many of my tendencies and the same is true for many people who have suffered in silence for years or even decades.
It's often difficult when a person has a condition or affliction that does not manifest itself in a change in a person's physical appearance. While I'm certainly not suggesting that life is a bowl of cherries for a person stricken with polio or cerebral palsy, when you encounter such a person, you can immediately see that something is different about them.
However, when a person suffers from a congenital defect (Klinefelter's Syndrome) or an autoimmune disease (fibromyalgia) or a neurological disorder (AS), nothing jumps out to meet the eye. You look to others as a "normal" person. There is no readily available sign that you suffer from one or more differences.
It's not uncommon for friends, family and colleagues -- even many in the medical community -- to think it's "all in your head". Some people will say you're just a malingerer or you are merely seeking attention or you're trying to get out of toeing the line re social expectations. Hear these things enough and you start to question yourself too!!
So, learning that there is an organic cause to your symptoms certainly provides you with better peace of mind. It's not all in your head or it is, but in a physiological sense.
But this sense of liberation comes at a cost. While learning you have a particular condition or malady is good, on the one hand, you have to be ever cognizant that you don't use this discovery to rationalize your behavior to the nth degree. Just because you have AS or Klinefelter, this doesn't give you a license to be a dolt. In other words, you have to be watchful that this label doesn't become a routine excuse for bad behavior.
Regardless of AS, I don't possess a license to hurt or offend others. While this will happen from time to time because of the differences of viewing and interacting with the world, I must learn to make compromises with those around me. While I hope others will learn about the many aspects of AS in terms of how I relate to them, I too need to be a better student of how my actions and words affect others.
I can't simply tread down my path with blinders on and expect others to get out of my way. I can't go through life like a bull in a china shop and, when I do or say something awkward or outside of social norms, merely exclaim, "Hey I have AS or Klinefelter's. It's not my fault."
As my motto states -- on the top left column of this blog -- I am part of the world and the world is part of me -- The One -- Tao. I simply have to figure out my realtion to the world and Tao as an aspie. It's not the easiest assignment I've ever had, but it's one I must complete.
In a manner of speaking, finding out you have AS is liberating! It means my weirdness is not derived solely from selfishness, arrogance or stubbornness. It means there is a neurological explanation for many of my tendencies and the same is true for many people who have suffered in silence for years or even decades.
It's often difficult when a person has a condition or affliction that does not manifest itself in a change in a person's physical appearance. While I'm certainly not suggesting that life is a bowl of cherries for a person stricken with polio or cerebral palsy, when you encounter such a person, you can immediately see that something is different about them.
However, when a person suffers from a congenital defect (Klinefelter's Syndrome) or an autoimmune disease (fibromyalgia) or a neurological disorder (AS), nothing jumps out to meet the eye. You look to others as a "normal" person. There is no readily available sign that you suffer from one or more differences.
It's not uncommon for friends, family and colleagues -- even many in the medical community -- to think it's "all in your head". Some people will say you're just a malingerer or you are merely seeking attention or you're trying to get out of toeing the line re social expectations. Hear these things enough and you start to question yourself too!!
So, learning that there is an organic cause to your symptoms certainly provides you with better peace of mind. It's not all in your head or it is, but in a physiological sense.
But this sense of liberation comes at a cost. While learning you have a particular condition or malady is good, on the one hand, you have to be ever cognizant that you don't use this discovery to rationalize your behavior to the nth degree. Just because you have AS or Klinefelter, this doesn't give you a license to be a dolt. In other words, you have to be watchful that this label doesn't become a routine excuse for bad behavior.
Regardless of AS, I don't possess a license to hurt or offend others. While this will happen from time to time because of the differences of viewing and interacting with the world, I must learn to make compromises with those around me. While I hope others will learn about the many aspects of AS in terms of how I relate to them, I too need to be a better student of how my actions and words affect others.
I can't simply tread down my path with blinders on and expect others to get out of my way. I can't go through life like a bull in a china shop and, when I do or say something awkward or outside of social norms, merely exclaim, "Hey I have AS or Klinefelter's. It's not my fault."
As my motto states -- on the top left column of this blog -- I am part of the world and the world is part of me -- The One -- Tao. I simply have to figure out my realtion to the world and Tao as an aspie. It's not the easiest assignment I've ever had, but it's one I must complete.
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